MindFull
by Silver Supa
Summary: When Diana is stuck by a minor case of ghostly possession, Akko travels inside of her friend's mind to help her from within. After all, it's not the first time she's been in someone's head, and it's not like Diana's mind would be any more harrowing for her than Sucy's, right? It won't be a big deal or anything. Given that it's Akko in there, things get...complicated. Very fast.
1. A Minor Case of Ghostly Possession

Ever since the big Noir missile shooty thing, which was Akko's name for the event and probably not the official one, she and Diana had become _much_ better friends. Sure, the girl still wasn't one to laugh loudly or joke around, and she seemed oddly uncomfortable whenever Akko even brought up the idea of a friendly hug, but compared to how hostile they were when they first met, there was no denying she had brought out a different side of her.

Diana was a closed off person in general, never one to be open with her thoughts and feelings, so it wasn't a surprise to see her keeping her guard up. But it was encouraging that she let it down more often than not when they were together. After the big Noir missile shooty thing, she was always willing to help Akko, or talk with Akko, or even just spend time with Akko for the sake of it. Probably more so than anyone else in Luna Nova, surprisingly enough. Akko herself considered it a true testament to their friendship if ever there was one.

Case in point, she was leading her and Sucy through the restricted Luna Nova Archives to go look for a book that they _probably_ weren't supposed to be looking for. They had a report due in Professor Lukic's class on poisonous creatures that they desperately needed a good grade for. Sucy knew firsthand of a special book, a bestiary on some of the most dangerous creatures in the magical world. She figured they could use it to make the Red Team's life a little easier. When Sucy had asked Diana for help getting it, she denied, claiming the book was off-limits to students and they needed to put in the work just like everyone else. But Akko was nothing if not stubborn, and once _she_ had asked, Diana relented and agreed to help them.

Ever the professors' favorite, Diana had earned exclusive access to the Archives to look at the book, and now clandestinely, she was letting her and Sucy in on that privilege as well. The two of them followed behind her into the darkened halls of the Archives. Had it been anyone else, the only way anyone could get in was with a professor hovering over their shoulders. But the Cavendish heiress was smart, polite, punctual and overall a trustworthy person who earned these sorts of favors. For as much as she disliked bending the rules, she was making an exception out of the kindness of her heart, and Akko didn't let that fact go unappreciated.

"Thanks again _so_ much for helping us, Diana!" She said enthusiastically, bouncing on her heels. "I promise, this is gonna be my best report ever!"

Sucy elbowed her with a smug grin. "It's not like your best report ever is a really high bar, anyway."

Diana turned and smiled at them, with an air of subdued amusement about her. "Yes, well, I'm sure if you put as much effort into studying as you did into finding ways around it, you would have no need for any of my help."

Akko's cheeks flushed. She knew it was all just lighthearted teasing. Frankly, she earned so much of it, she was pretty much used to it from everyone by now. But it was different when it came from Diana, for reasons she couldn't really say. Most likely, because she never really made jokes. Akko forced herself to chuckle, unable to think of something to actually say in response. Instead, she let her eyes wander around the dark room, squinting at various shelves and items.

The Archives were a massive, labyrinthine room. The shelves went all the way to the ceiling, several stories high above their heads, and each one held artifacts Luna Nova deemed significant in some magic-related manner. Some of them resembled ordinary household items, while others were strange threatening looking objects that Akko couldn't hope to put a name to. There were stones and papers whose simple appearances belied a sinister purpose, essences of extinct creatures and malevolent beasts, and oddly shaped containers holding who knows what. They all seemed to be placed on the shelves at random, and if there was a method to finding something, Akko certainly couldn't say. At a glance, there was nothing that immediately resembled a book.

"Sooo…There's a lot of stuff here, huh…?" She thought aloud.

Diana nodded, replacing her earlier mirth with her typical seriousness. "The Archives are home to some of the more volatile magical artifacts in the entire country. There's a reason it's highly restricted. Everything in here is one of a kind, and many are both powerful and dangerous. There's no telling how many items in here are cursed, so please, don't touch anything."

"I wasn't gonna touch anything but the book!" Akko defended herself. "…Where is it anyway? How do you find _anything_ in here?"

"…Admittedly, the Archives are in serious need of a cataloguing system."

The statement turned out to be a severe understatement. For over fifteen minutes they wandered the corners of the room, poking around almost aimlessly. They found a few tomes and spell books after some persistent searching, but the bestiary was nowhere near them. Even between the three of them, they had barely covered even half the Archives in that time. Whatever allure there was in being allowed access to a restricted section circled the drain, especially since with the rule of not touching anything, it was a glorified museum of things she had no names or context for.

Diana and Sucy had a quick back-and-forth on whether the bestiary was even here in the first place, but eventually agreed to check out different corners of the room, leaving Akko more or less in silence. She scanned what shelves she could see, but she had only the vaguest idea of what the book looked like, (It had an orange cover apparently) leaving her mostly relying on the others to find it. She leaned back against the wall and stifled a yawn, listening to the sound of footsteps reverberating off the stone walls.

The quiet was broken by an echoing voice that seemed to come from right next to her ear. "Atsuko…please…"

Akko jumped, and her breath caught in her throat. She whipped to face the others, but neither were paying her any attention, focusing solely on their search. And now that she thought about it, the voice didn't sound like either of them anyway. And there wasn't anyone who still called her by her full name. But _someone_ had just called her. If it wasn't them, then who? And hadn't they heard it?

"Atsuko…set me free…"

Akko looked around, trying to discern where the voice was coming from. It sounded like a girl's, but none she had ever heard. There was definitely no one else in here with them given the place was restricted to students, and it was too young to be a professor. It _sounded_ like it was coming from right next to her ear, but there was no one immediately next to her.

Her attention was suddenly caught by a plain jar sitting on a shelf just above her head. It was a blue, vase-looking object that was about the size of her hand, with a large plug stuffed into the top. It was completely nondescript, and her eyes had passed it over before in their search, but when she looked at it _now,_ there was something…off about it. She couldn't say what, but it stole her attention like nothing else. There wasn't any special markings or anything all that notable about it at first glance, and yet, it was just strange, in some inexplicable way. The voice that had called out to her hummed approvingly.

Somewhere in the back of her mind, she recalled a warning not to touch anything, but she had to make an exception for this. She needed to know what was inside this jar, and there was simply no way she could resist. Magic always made her curious, but this feeling was so much deeper. It was insatiable, like a deep-seated hunger. She _had_ to know what was inside it.

"Open the vessel…" The voice told her as she reached for it. "Atsuko…open the vessel…"

Her body moved almost mechanically, reaching up to pull it from the shelf. She turned it over in her hands, weighing it. Was it strange that it felt right, to have it in her hands? She didn't know, but she was single-minded in opening the vessel. Her fingers curled around the plug, and as she prepared to pull it out, a shiver of anticipation ran down her spine.

Suddenly a hand grabbed her wrist. Her heart skipped a beat as she was forced back to reality. Catching her breath, she realized Diana was right next to her, stopping her hand from pulling the plug. "Akko! Snap out of it! Can you hear me now?"

Now? Had she been calling out to her? Akko hadn't heard anything from her this entire time. "O-oh. Um. Sorry, I forgot you were here…"

Diana huffed. "This is what I meant when I said many things in here were cursed. You're lucky I was here to stop you."

"Wait, I…I was almost cursed?" She peered down at the jar in her hand. All its mystique had disappeared, and it looked like just a plain, boring glass bottle. It was almost unnerving. Whatever was in this thing was messing with her head. It would be better to put it back before it did anything else.

Diana reached to take it from her hand, but a voice in Akko's head screamed at her not to let it go. Her fingers tightened around it, refusing to let her prize leave. The sudden resistance startled Diana, and she lost her footing, barely catching herself before she fell to the ground. Forcing herself back to her senses, Akko quickly let go of the jar, at the same time Diana's grip loosened. The two gasped as the jar fell to the ground and shattered by their feet, sending glass everywhere. The plug rolled across the floor. It didn't even look like anything was inside it at all.

Akko sheepishly chuckled. "…It's not my fault?"

Diana just crossed her arms, looking distinctly unimpressed. "Akko, I _said_ not to touch-" But when she looked back down at the remains of the jar, her glare flattened. "…Oh."

Akko paled. She had been preparing herself for a stern lecture about breaking the rules again, but somehow having her just…stop like that, with concern just barely masked on her face, was so, _so_ much worse. "Oh? What do you mean oh? Is…is it something bad?"

Diana pursed her lips for a moment, then her expression quickly turned serious. "Alright. Stay calm, Akko."

"What?!" Akko screeched. She wasn't naïve. Nothing good _ever_ came out of being told to stay calm out of the blue. "W-what do you mean stay calm?! What happened?! What was in the jar?!"

"Stay _calm_ , Akko." Diana repeated as she took ahold of the shorter girl's shoulders. She explained in a slow, neutral voice. "Now, the jar held an ancient spirit, known as the Phantom of Faiwu. It invades its victim's minds and attempts to take over their bodies, where it uses them to-"

"W-what?! There's a ghost inside my head?!" Akko interrupted, running her hands through her hair. "I'm gonna be _possessed?!_ "

"Of course not. I'm not going to let that happen." Diana took a deep breath, and pulled out her wand. "Now, the easiest way to repel the spirit is from the inside, before it gets a chance to claim your mind. I need to quiet your mind, so I'm going to…" She seemingly paused.

"…Yeah?" Akko stared expectantly, waiting for her to finish. "Uh…going to what? You okay, or…?"

Diana's words had just cut off. Her mouth was still hanging open, like she had been frozen mid-sentence. Just as Akko was about to snap her fingers at her, Diana's legs gave out. Her hand slipped from Akko's shoulder as she fell to her knees.

"D-Diana!" Akko bent down to help her up. "What happened?"

Diana rubbed her forehead, and her eyes were glazed over. "W-what?" She breathed. "But…it got _me?_

Wait, the ghost had possessed her instead? But it had called out to Akko, hadn't it? How had Diana gotten affected by it?

"But…but how? I thought it was going for-" Diana suddenly groaned in pain. She doubled over, holding her head in her hands. Akko couldn't deny it was a relief to know there wasn't a ghost running around in her own head. But seeing it happen to someone else, and one of her closest friends to boot, was even worse. Especially when it was actually hurting her to fight it off. At least Diana actually knew what to do to fix it. Akko was completely clueless.

It was about that time Sucy returned, holding a thick orange book in her hand, calling out to Diana. "Hey, so, you were wrong. The book was over-" She blinked, watching the girl groaning on her knees. "…Oh. What did I miss?"

"S-Sucy!" Akko sat up. "Diana got possessed by a ghost! W-we gotta do something!"

"…I'm…I'm not possessed yet." Diana managed to say. "The…agh, the best way to dispel the spirit is to enter the unconscious victim's mi-" She clutched her forehead, pinching her eyes shut. "M-mind, and find the spirit within. I just…need to find someone. I need to remember which…which professor said she had experience with that…"

"Go inside the person's mind and…" Akko clapped her hands in realization. "Oh! I did that once! I know how that works!"

Back in the beginning of the year, when Sucy had fallen under Sleeping Witch Sickness, Lotte had sent Akko into her mind to wake her from within. She ran around Sucy's mindscape, meeting with a bunch of mental versions of her to try and find the original, the one that was the core of her consciousness, in order to wake her up both in there and in real life. She hadn't really thought about it since, but that must be what Diana talking about.

Diana's face scrunched up in disbelief. "What? How in the world do _you_ have experience with-?" She painfully moaned, struggling to keep upright. "It…it doesn't matter, I suppose. If you know how to do this, then I don't have much choice. I'm going to rely on you."

"Wait, you want _me_ to…?"

"I need someone to go in there and fix this quickly, and I…I trust you, Akko. If this spirit possesses me, it's going to use my body to…" She averted her gaze. "J-just, get it out _before_ we have to deal with the consequences. You two can't let me leave this room until it's purged."

Akko bit her lip. There was no way she was going to abandon a friend in need, but this was a lot of pressure. She had some experience, to be sure, but not enough to bet someone's head on. "W-what do I do, then? How do I get it out?"

"S-stay calm. I'm sure you can do it. Just…go in there, exorcise it from..." She bit her lip as her muscles tensed. Akko struggled to keep from freaking out at her friend's distress.

"Are…are you okay?"

"I'm being possessed, obviously not." She snapped. "…that was uncalled for. Sorry, it's just… _severely_ unpleasant." Which was fancy people talk for it hurt like hell. "I've never traveled in someone's mind, but I believe you just need to find the center of it. The core. That's where it should be trying to…agh…"

She winced, and using the rest of her willpower, called out to the other witch in the room with them. "Rrgh, S-Sucy! Cast _obdormiscere_!" She pointed at her wand. "T-three half-flicks counter-clockwise!"

Calmly (almost lazily), Sucy pulled out her wand and repeated the incantation. A blue beam shot out through the air, phasing into Diana's head. Her breath escaped her, and her eyes fluttered before she slowly fell backwards. By the time her head hit the ground, she had already passed out.

Akko looked over her sleeping form. Her body was deathly still, and her only motion was the gentle rising and falling off her chest. She didn't look like she was sleeping peacefully, however. Even unconscious, her brows were furrowed and she was gritting her teeth. She had said it would slow the possession down somehow, but it still looked like it was taking her considerable effort.

Akko took a deep breath, and stood to face Sucy. "O-okay. So…we gotta send me in there. You know how to do it, right?"

Sucy thought for a moment, and then nodded, with a small smile on her lips.

Akko shook out the last of her nervousness. "Then let's do it." She closed her eyes in preparation, trying to psyche herself up.

There was a lot of pressure on her shoulders, and there was so much at stake that Diana could lose. She couldn't deny almost wishing it was the other way around. Not so much because she wanted someone else poking around inside her head, because that's weird, but more because she didn't want to let her friend down. But no, she realized, that was the wrong way to think about it. She wasn't going to fail.

She could do this. She did it once! And if Diana was counting on her, then she could do it again. All she had to do was go in there, find the core before the Phantom of whatever did, and get that guy out of there. She's dealt with ghosts, and she's dealt with entering people's heads, so doing both at once would be no big deal. Heck, all things considered, she _was_ pretty experienced when it came to dealing with weird stuff. This should end up being a painless adventure. She was definitely going to fix this for her, no question about it.

Wait.

As she considered her past experience with going into people's brains, a memory popped forth of when she had done it last. More specifically, a memory of the actual spell used to send her into someone else's mind. Even more specifically, the fact that it had really hurt. She had to be knocked out in order to get into Sucy's mind. When the spell was cast, it turned Lotte's wand into a magic baseball bat, which she used to hit her in the side of the he-

Her thought were interrupted when a magic baseball bat hit her in the side of the head. With a loud metallic sounding impact, the bat rattled her skull and her eyes rolled back in her head. She crumpled to the ground almost instantly. As she fell into unconsciousness, the last sound she heard was Sucy cackling to herself about having a good time.

* * *

 _A.N. So I said to myself, hey Supa. What's the dumbest, most self-indulgent thing you can write? And I said, I know, we'll play off the episode where Akko goes into Sucy's mind, except we'll make it Diana instead, and also, shippy~. So it's been sitting in my draft folder a while, but I figured I'd polish it up a little and see if any of you lot wanted to read it. That I'm writing this so soon after my last story has little, if anything, to do with procrastination._

 _Here in the sorta prologue we get a good old, multifaceted Diana, to contrast with the one-dimensional Dianas that make up her personality that Akko's gonna be dealing with for the next few chapters. And there are a lot of those for her to deal with. I'm sure she'll handle it with her usual gracefulness. Always been a fan of this type of metaphor, and with a character as controlled as Diana, picking around in her mind is fun._


	2. Her Usual Gracefulness

So first things first. Being hit with a bat still really hurt. A lot. Between the pounding in the side of her head and the peculiar feeling of not being awake but also not really being asleep, her head was sort of a mess at the moment. Better than having a ghost in it, but not by a whole lot. It took a few moans and groans before she opened her eyes.

Akko wasn't sure what she expected to see when she did. The inside of Sucy's mind had been a gigantic field full of mushrooms, and really that was her only reference point for what a mindscape looked like. Diana and Sucy were completely different people, so naturally the shape of their…brains or whatever would be different, but nonetheless, she couldn't deny her shock when she found herself standing in, of all things, some sort of lobby.

It was actually a fairly posh-looking waiting room. The floor was decorated with a fine navy blue carpet, and the walls were a beige color that was easy on the eyes. There was a door made of rich mahogany on the far wall, next to a short row of wooden chairs. Fancy, but not excessively so. The room gave off a vibe of casual, yet controlled neutrality, like the waiting rooms of a hospital or a high-class office building.

The most striking feature of the room, however, was the reception desk at the opposite end. It was a large, curved, wooden desk, with some intricate yet somewhat understated plants and vines carved into the face. But what was even stranger was the secretary sitting behind it who was constantly checking her watch, and paying no attention to anything but her work. It was Diana.

Or no, maybe that wasn't right. It was a Diana, at least. She had met an entire army of Sucys back in her head. Unlike before, however, there weren't any Dianas just hanging out in this room with them. Right now in this mental office lobby, there was only Akko and this one version of her, dressed like nothing Akko had seen her wear before. She wore a fine silk blouse, a dark pencil skirt and a pair of reading glasses. Her long blonde hair was tied up in a tight bun on the back of her head. She looked like a modern, professional business woman. Or maybe a librarian.

Akko stared at her in disbelief. In her experience, which really was only the one time if she was honest, all the Sucys running around each apparently represented some part of her personality or her desires. So, that must be what this secretary was, some aspect of what made the Cavendish girl herself. Diana was a pretty…controlled person, to put it lightly. Akko approached the desk, and the secretary behind it just kept checking her watch and writing things down on a clipboard, paying her no mind. There were timetables and schedules neatly laid out all across the desk, a bounty of evidence this was some representation of Diana's punctuality.

Akko waved to the Punctual Diana to get her attention. "Hey Diana, I'm here now! Ready to find that ghost! So where is-?"

But instead of looking up at her, she just glowered at her clipboard. "You will have to wait. Talking does not fit into the schedule."

Akko deflated. "The…schedule?"

Punctual Diana tapped her chin, still not looking up. "Hmm. We seem to be asleep right now." She scribbled something down on the clipboard. "No. That doesn't fit into the schedule. Typical sleep times range from 9:00pm onwards. We should not be sleeping before nightfall."

Odd. She didn't recognize her, nor did she remember she had just asked them to knock her out and slow the possession. Maybe this one needed a reminder. "I can actually explain that. So the reason Diana is asleep right now is beca-"

Punctual Diana shushed her. "If you would like to talk, you should make an appointment. Doing things impulsively without proper time to prepare is unwise."

"But this is important! There's a ghost in here and you sent me in here to get it! Remember?"

"I told you to wait, Miss. I have many important dates to manage, and I cannot be interrupted." She flipped the page on her clipboard, reading over yet another timetable. "Now, where was I? Magical Linguistics exam on May 4th, at 2:00pm. Report on History of European Witchcraft due on May 11th. Upcoming Birthday upon May 22nd." She scribbled a note on the page. "Must allot time to think of and purchase gift."

Akko drummed her fingers on the desk. "But none of those things are even close! I need help _now!_ "

Punctual Diana bristled at the noise. "Miss, as I have told you repeatedly, there is no time in the schedule for talking. I am very busy at this moment." Her eyes narrowed behind her glasses. "I wasn't aware we had time for any emotions to be running around right now."

"But if we don't do something, then Diana's gonna get possessed, and then you guys won't have time for anything! I'm trying to help you guys!" She wasn't even sure why she had to argue this point. She was in Diana's head, and this was literally her. Surely she would remember the fact that she had _just_ sent Akko in here to fight this ghost guy.

Punctual Diana just rolled her eyes, and pressed a red button on her desk. Before Akko could protest again, the office door suddenly burst open behind her. She turned to see who had just been called in, only to find the newcomer was already directly behind her, looking none too impressed.

Another Diana, though this one was dressed like a police officer, with black pants and a blue shirt with a badge proudly displayed on her chest. Her hair was tied in a ponytail, and covered by her hat. More pressingly than the police-like way she was dressed, however, was the police-like way she glared down at Akko. Her gaze reminded her of back when Diana had been much more antagonistic to her, jumping on her with reprimands any time she did wrong. The Officer was standing at attention with her hands on her hips, and considering the height difference between Akko and her, it was a threatening display.

The Officer dismissively arched a brow. "What in the world is going on in here? You better not be interfering with the workflow." She squinted down at her. "And I don't recall receiving _any_ word from the higher-ups about someone like you having permission to be here."

"The higher-ups? What? But…I'm…" Akko couldn't even stammer out a protest before she was interrupted. It was obvious the Officer wasn't interested in excuses.

"I don't care how prepossessing you look, all Dianas need to respect the laws of the mind!" The Officer crossed her arms. "These rules apply to everyone, and that includes you! Unless you have clearance, I suggest you return to your proper station immediately."

Akko couldn't help but swallow. "L-look, Diana-"

The Officer flared at the name. "How dare you address me so familiarly!" she growled. "It is completely improper etiquette! You will refer to me _only_ as Miss Diana, Officer Diana, or sir! Am I understood?"

"B-but it's me! It's Akko! I mean, we're friends, right?"

"Akko...?" The Officer repeated. But instead of easing up, like she had hoped, the name seemed to annoy her even more. "Are you saying you're _not_ a Diana?"

"…No? But I'm here in her mind to-"

"Unacceptable!" The Officer reached down and angrily grabbed her wrist, paying no attention to the way Akko flinched. "I have no patience for foreign entities in this psyche!"

"Ow! Wait, hey!" The Officer began to drag her away, ignoring Akko's flailing. "W-what are you doing?!"

"Save it for Judge Diana!" She said curtly over her shoulder. "Clearly you don't belong here! You're lucky it's not up to me, or I'd deem you an irrelevant thought here and now!"

"Wait, judge? You're going to _arrest_ me?! But it's me, Akko! I'm trying to-!"

"You are a foreign entity in this mind, and you're _trying_ to cause disruption."

Four and half minutes in and she was being arrested. And wasn't _that_ just her luck. Why these mind-people didn't realize the situation, she couldn't say, but she didn't have time to explain it. Akko swept the Officer's leg, causing her to lose her footing. As bad as she felt about having to be mean, the real Diana would thank her later. She wriggled her wrist free, threw open the office door and booked it, as fast as she could. Once the Officer got her bearings again, she gave chase. Or attempted to, at least.

Much to the Officer's surprise, Akko was _fast_. She had spent much of her schoolyear in mortal peril, and running for her life was nothing if not good cardio. One doesn't survive as long as she did without building some fine leg muscles. The chase was hardly a contest, and it didn't take long for the long arm of the law to fall hopelessly behind.

Still, she didn't know where she was going, and she needed to hide somewhere before she got arrested by mental cops fashioned after her closest friends.

For the second time in her life.

Akko slowed her pace just enough to get a better look at her surroundings. As big as this office hallway was, there weren't actually many doors or working places. In fact, there was only a single exit at the end. A pair of double doors that read " _Repression Wing._ " It's not like she could backwards, so through the doors she went.

Inside, it was almost like a mash-up of a massive apartment complex and an office space. There were at least two dozen doors in front of her alone, and that wasn't even going into how likely it was there was more beyond the corner at the end of the hall. Each one of them was labelled with both a letter and a three digit number. Which meant it was organized (because of course it would be) and there were also a _lot_ of these rooms, whatever they were.

The sound of rapidly approaching footsteps snapped her back to reality. The Officer was still after her, and she definitely didn't have time to be gawking. With little other options, Akko quietly slipped into the very first door in the hallway, closing it behind her. She immediately pressed her ear to the wood, straining to hear where her pursuer was. When she heard footsteps run past the door and continue on, Akko let a quiet sigh of relief escape her lips. She turned and pressed her back at against the door, finally out of peril again. Only then did she realize where she was.

The inside of the first repression room looked like one of Luna Nova's dorm rooms, though only on the surface. Like everything she had seen in here thus far, it was better suited to someone with more refined tastes and a more expensive lifestyle, and the three beds, desks, and the closet all looked like they were made of much finer materials than what the Academy actually used. More pressingly, however, was that she finally registered the room's occupants all staring at the sudden intruder in their space. The room was already occupied by three different manifestations of Diana.

The one sitting on the bed caught Akko's eye first. She looked closest to the real Diana, especially since she actually had the Luna Nova uniform on. But unlike the real one, the colors of her uniform were much more saturated. Whereas they were usually a dark indigo in the real world, the vest and skirt were a rich violet, and the sash tied around her hips was a bright sky-blue. It wasn't just the uniform's colors either. Even the girl's hair was more of a brilliant yellow than blonde, and her eyes were a much deeper blue. At a glance, she looked brighter in every way possible, compounded with the wide grin on her face. She was definitely…amused by Akko's entrance, covering her mouth and biting her lower lip, looking like she was just _barely_ managing to hold in a laugh.

The one near the closet was colored more like the genuine article, and her astonished expression was much more characteristic, even if her outfit was not. She was wearing a white sundress that fell to her knees. It was a flowing, sleeveless design, accented with pastel pink frills on the hem and a matching belt around her waist. It was the kind of outfit that seemed perfect for a day off in the spring. Simple and understated, but admittedly lovely. A white rose was placed in her hair. All three of them were reacting to her entrance, but this one with the rose was staring unflinchingly at Akko, with her hand over her heart and the smallest tinge of pink on her cheeks.

The one leaning back at the desk, arching a brow at her, was probably the most uncharacteristic looking of all. She had the blouse of the school uniform on, but the vest and tie were long gone, and the sleeves were rolled up, revealing snake-like tattoos going up her forearms. The bottom of the shirt had been tied up to expose her midriff. Her skirt was frayed and ripped, and it looked like she had never combed her hair in her life. While she didn't look outright hostile, her expression made no secret that she was aloof, unimpressed and fiercely independent. She gave off a very rebellious vibe.

Akko, with her back still pressed up against the door, awkwardly waved her fingers at the three. "…Hi?"

The colorful Diana suddenly clutched her stomach with a snort. To Akko's surprise, she had doubled over, laughing loudly like she didn't have a care in the world. Akko had barely heard Diana chuckle more than once, but this was a full belly sound that was completely uninhibited. "Pffft! O-oh my-!" She could barely speak through her giggles. "Y-you're hilarious! Hahaha! I can't believe you just burst in here like that!"

"Y-yeah." Akko said, easing off the door. What an odd thing to laugh at. "I, uh…had to get away from the police lady, so don't tell anyone I'm here, okay?"

Instead of responding, the Laughing Diana just doubled over again, falling forward on the bed, giggling like a maniac. Akko was sort of at a loss on how to react. She hadn't even said anything funny.

The Rebel leaned off the desk, looking almost impressed. "You're eludin' Officer Diana, eh?" She smirked deviously. "Good. She's goddamn obstinate, is what she is. Anyone who pisses her off is okay in my book."

"Uh…Thanks, I guess." Akko had never heard that kind of vulgar language in that voice before. It sounded like a weird mish-mash of her fancy, bigger-words-than-she-needs talk and the way Amanda talked. She was pretty sure that fact would annoy the real Diana. "So…I'm Akko, and I'm looking for a ghost, and I could use some help. You guys know anything about that, or…?"

She trailed off, gesturing to the two of them to finish for her. She was hoping unlike the Officer or Punctual Diana, _one_ of these people would remember sending her in here and how to deal with the Phantom, because she certainly didn't. The two stared blankly at her, at least for a moment.

"Pff-hfft!" The Laughing Diana suddenly covered her mouth. "Heehee! Y-you came in here looking for a _ghost?!_ Why would there be a ghost in here?"

"Wha-? This isn't funny!" Akko argued. "It isn't _supposed_ to be here, and if I don't find this Phantom of whatever, it's gonna take over this whole mind!"

The Laughing Diana tried to hide her smile. "Okay okay! S-sorry! I'll take this serious, I promise! I promise." She bit her finger to try and stop herself from giggling, not looking a single bit more serious than she did before. It was becoming doubtful that she even could.

"The hell you mean 'take over'?" The Rebel asked, making no effort to hide her irritation. "Oh, that's _just_ what I need, _more_ people trying to impose upon me. They barely allow me out of here as it is!"

"Yes!" Akko agreed. "So you gotta help-!"

The Rebel just ignored her. "Officer Diana is always coming at me like; hey Diana Who Is Independent, your behavior is so detestable, like that's not literally what I was made to do!"

"Yeah yeah. Okay, but-!"

"And please! Like hell am I going to follow every ordinance they send at me! These punks are always trying to take away my autonomy! I don't even mess with Diana Who Is Punctual's precious schedule that much!"

Akko groaned in frustration. Why did _none_ of these people appreciate the danger they were in? A whole head full of the smartest and most competent person she knew, and she couldn't get any help at all. They were all just focused on one little trait, and the whole 'evil ghost trying to take over the mind' thing barely seemed to register to them.

And these two in particular almost didn't even seem like Diana's traits in the first place. It wasn't like Diana never broke the rules or didn't have a sense of humor, but these were sides of her Akko had never seen. Maybe that was what Repression Wing meant. These people were probably being held back a lot. Unless she could find some Helpful Diana or someone similar, it looked like she was going to be on her own.

Akko arched her brow at the Diana wearing the rose in her hair. Both because she had no idea what she was supposed to represent, as well as she hadn't said a word this whole time. As Akko made eye-contact, she saw her gently gasp.

"Is…is that truly you, Akko?" The Rose-wearing one asked her.

Akko blinked. "Wait, do you know who I am?"

She was the first of these weird brain-people to recognize her. Which, now that she thought about it, maybe made some sense, considering they were just emotions and not actually Diana. But still, it would've made things a lot easier if they _had_ her actual memories, then Akko wouldn't have gotten brushed off at the front desk or almost arrested like a criminal. And then there was the fact that Diana knew much more about how to deal with this ghost than her.

"Oh, of course I know you." Rose said. "You're Akko."

She said her name almost breathlessly, like she couldn't believe it was her. Admittedly, it _was_ sort of strange that for how much these Dianas only had one emotion to them, this Rose one seemed to know her by name unlike everyone else. But it probably didn't mean anything, and Akko needed all the help she could get.

"So you can help me, right?" Akko asked encouragingly. "Because I could really use someone to come with me and show me where to find the original! You can do that, right?"

"Of course I can. For you, Akko? I would do anything to help."

"Yay! You're the best!" Akko cheered. _Finally_ , someone who wasn't giving her trouble. Rose looked moved by her praise, as a joyous smile spread up her cheeks. Akko still didn't know what she represented, but maybe this was Diana's good side, or maybe she _was_ actually Helpful Diana. Either way, it was nice change of pace from things going weird for her.

Her typical confidence renewed, Akko pumped her fist. "Now all we gotta do is go find the original, and the ghost should be there! And then we just gotta figure out…" She stopped when Rose had walked decidedly to her side, with the smile still bright on her features. "…Eh? What are you…?"

Before she could even finish, Rose looped both of her arms around Akko's right, hugging her now captive limb close to her heart. She was all but leaning on top of the shorter girl, especially as she rested her head down on Akko's shoulder. Akko felt the blood rush to her face.

"W-whoa! Um, okay! You're s-sorta close there..." She squeaked out. Apparently this Diana liked friendly hugs. "T-thanks for helping me though."

"Oh, Akko…" The girl sighed dreamily, cuddling up against her arm. She lifted her head from Akko's shoulder to gaze into her eyes. "How could I _ever_ refuse the girl I love?"

"Wait, the girl you…" Akko narrowed her eyes. Perhaps it was just the proximity, because she was _really_ close to her right now, but she had just misheard what the girl clinging to her arm just said to her with such a fond tone of voice. Because when she heard the words, it _sounded_ like the rose-wearing Diana just said…that…she…

"Y-you _what_ now?!"

* * *

 _A.N. I mean_

 _Yeah._

 _Obviously._

 _Where else was this going to go?_

 _Making up all these other Dianas and making really literal appearances for them is like, half the reason I'm writing this. There's an odd sort of irony in that by adding more one-dimensional characters to this, it implies more depth to the real Diana. Plus, it gives Akko more personalities to play off of, which is a blast. Which is technically stretching the rules of the episode, but we can chalk it up to personality differences. Somehow, Diana's mind being a boring office building where everyone was dressed according to their role just felt appropriate._

 _And_ Jiminy Christmas _, this got a huge response! Like, bigger than anything I've written! I got like over 60 email alerts in a day, and the story didn't even start yet! Nothing even happened yet! I mean, if you guys liked it more power to you, I guess. It's just…whoa._


	3. Gal Pals

Akko was pretty sure that if her face ever caught on fire, but most of the flames only really focused on her cheeks and the tips of her ears, it would feel just a little bit like this felt right now.

"Did you not hear me, Akko?" Rose tilted her head daintily, still wrapped around her arm. "I said I could never refuse the girl I love. That's you, of course."

"Y-you…wha…huh…habba…ha?" Her mouth opened and closed, in an approximation to forming sentences. The result was something more akin to a fish gasping on dry land.

She was sure her face was completely scarlet. And every time she even opened her mouth to ask what in the world was going on, the only noise she could manage besides incoherent babble was an undignified squeaking. A million thoughts were running through her head and she couldn't articulate a single one, not while the girl was still embracing her like this. The Diana with the rose in her hair was a bit of a wild card, and Akko hadn't been sure what aspect of her friend's personality she was supposed to be. But now she was clinging to her arm, while saying completely un-Diana things like _that she loved her?!_

Laughing Diana gave a delighted and unladylike snort. "W-what did she say?"

Rose tutted at her. "She said, you wha huh habba ha." She repeated earnestly. "You really must listen to her. I am sure it means something very important."

She wasn't sure if her brain was on high alert or if it was shutting off, but by God _something_ wasn't working right. It didn't even make sense. Not a single bit of this did, and if there was a state of being Akko was familiar with it was missing major pieces of information. She just needed to force her brain to think this through.

Because it's not like Diana could _actually_ have these sorts of feelings for someone like _Akko_ , right? That was just…silly, wasn't it? Maybe this was just the lingering effects of the lovelove bee? Rose was acting a lot like Diana did when she was stung at the party, with the whole completely crazy and in love thing. That would explain why Diana was holding back the feelings, because it was just some sickness and not her actual thoughts. But then, that was months ago. There was no way there'd still be lingering side-effects, even repressed ones.

But there had to be some other meaning she was missing. If it wasn't the lovelove bee, then there had to be something else at play here, because there was no way Rose could be serious with this. She ran through the whole conversation again in her head, being as analytical as she ever could be. She said she loved her, but that didn't mean _romantic_ love, necessarily. It could be like when someone says they love their best friend. No, not like, that was _exactly_ what it was.

Diana was not an affectionate person, so perhaps Rose represented her platonic affection for Akko. For _all_ her friends. Akko brought up the idea of friendly hugs to her all the time, and she'd always look away and get uncomfortable. Rose was that part of her that wanted those friendly hugs, and _that_ would explain why she was clinging to her arm. And she was never that warm and open with anyone else, but maybe a part of her wanted to be, and this was that part. This was Diana's subconscious desire to be more friendly and affectionate with everyone.

Yes. That was a _much_ easier explanation to work with.

She felt a small burst of pride in herself for having deduced Rose's identity. And if nothing else, it made it easier to look at the way she was embracing her and not blush or stutter as much. With any luck, it might actually make it easier to speak to her as well.

"Y-you k-know-" Akko cleared her throat and tried again. This time when she spoke she sounded a little more like a human being. "You know, you can…let go of my arm."

Rose just hummed and somehow hugged her even closer, and quite a bit of Akko's renewed resolved drained away. She tugged at her collar. When did it get so stuffy in here? Because it was really stuffy in here. "A-anyway!" Akko said, placing her free hand on her hip. "I need to find the original, so I can you know, fix this and get outta here."

"Akko…" Rose whined. "Don't tease me, you can't leave when you've only just arrived."

"I…I mean, it's not like I can stay…"

"You can stay as long as you like." She squeezed her arm reassuringly. "You've finally come to my side, and I pray you never leave it."

Boy, she must _really_ not be scratching that friendship itch, because this was intense _._ Akko searched for an excuse. "I…I need to...do homework? I guess?"

"Nerd." The Rebel called out. Laughing Diana fell backwards. Rose just gasped, affronted.

"Don't insult her! I won't allow you to hurt her fragile heart!"

The Rebel opened her mouth to respond, only to be cut off by Akko's indignation. "Okay, look!" She called out, trying unsuccessfully to free her arm. "I just need to find the original, before she gets taken over! Does _anyone_ wanna help me or not?!"

"Akko, I would help you with anyth-"

"I _know_ you would, Rose."

"Rose? My name is-"

Akko held up her hand, cutting her off. It was probably rude, but she made it difficult for her to concentrate. In any case, Rose hardly seemed offended. "Does anyone _else_ wanna help me make sure you don't all turn into zombies or whatever happens to you guys when a ghost takes over?"

"Eh." The Rebel shrugged. "I have no desire to go and do work for someone else, but at the same time, what I wouldn't give to get out of this room once in a while."

"Aw come on!" Laughing Diana…laughed, pointing at her and Rose. "You two just got to leave a little while ago!"

Akko's brows furrowed. It took her a minute to realize the implications of what she said, given how weirdly metaphorical it all was. Diana had been breaking the rules when she let them into the Archives, so if the Rebel was the part of her that only cared about her _own_ rules, that would probably mean the Rebel got out before. And Rose would've been released as well, as she had only broke the rules because she was friends with Akko.

…AND Sucy! Diana had broken the rules because she was friends with Akko _and_ Sucy. They were all friends and Rose made Diana do it for both of them and not just her. Heck, she probably was _better_ friends with Sucy now, considering who landed here in this possession mess in the first place.

Akko encouraged the rebellious girl to give her a hand. "If you wanna get out, you could come with me and help save the original Diana!"

"…Yeah, I don't think so." She said dismissively. "My task is to break the rules and be independent, so I'm not really supposed to that. Hell, I _used_ to be the most problematic Diana in here, before a couple months ago!" She said, with some mix of pride and loss in her voice.

"Eh? But…" Akko sputtered. "If your job is to break rules, and helping me breaks the rules, wouldn't you _want_ to do it?"

The Rebel just scoffed. "Please! Like I'm goi-"

Suddenly, an ethereal ghostly wail started to ring out through the air. Akko flinched as the sound pounded against her eardrums. It sounded like it was coming from everywhere at once, projecting its frustration across the whole mind. There were no discernable words, but Akko's eyes narrowed all the same. It was the same voice that had called her to open the cursed jar, the one now trying to take over Diana's mind.

But when she turned to explain this to the three, they were all frozen, in the exact place they had been before the wailing started. It was like time had just paused for them. The Rebel's mouth hung open mid-scoff. Rose still had the gentle smile on her unblinking face. The Laughing Diana, who had been bouncing on the bed, was hanging in midair. Akko slipped her arm free, and waved her now free hand in front of Rose's face. She gave no reaction to her presence. It was only when the frustrated wailing stopped did any of them move.

"-ng to do that!" The Rebel continued, seemingly unaware anything had happened.

Rose blinked when she realized she was holding onto nothing, with her former captive standing across from her. "What? When did you move, Akko?"

"None of you guys noticed that?" Akko asked. "At all?"

If nothing else, it was the first question she had about what was going on that actually got answered. That explained why none of the people here seemed to know about the possession thing. "You guys were all just frozen by the ghost guy!"

"What?" The Rebel sat up, looking vaguely horrified. "But…my autonomy!"

"Yeah, so _that's_ why you gotta help me fight him!" Akko thought for a moment. "…Her! It! Whatever!"

"This…creature froze us, and you want to confront him?" Rose asked, wide-eyed. "In person? You want to find the original to _fight_ such a thing?"

"I mean, I don't _totally_ have a plan on how to beat it." Akko admitted, trying to play it off as a joke. "I dunno if you can actually punch ghosts, but I'll figure something out when I get-" Rose suddenly grabbed her by the shoulders. "-there?"

"Oh, but Akko!" Rose cried out. She seemed genuinely scared, in a way Diana would _never_ let herself be seen. "You can't go! What if you were to get hurt?"

"But I can't just-"

"What if it's as dangerous as you think? I could never bear to see something happen to you!"

As completely bizarre as it was seeing the ever-dignified Cavendish so blatantly distressed, Akko didn't let it shake her resolve. She shrugged her hands off her shoulders and leveled her, and by extension the other two, with a determined stare.

"I _have_ to go!" She argued. "Even if it's just by myself! Diana needs my help, and she said she trusted me, so I can't let her down. And I'm not gonna let any undead thing mess with any of my friends. I don't care if this ghost _is_ super dangerous or whatever, I'm not going to let him scare me! I've dealt with way more crazy stuff!"

And really, what was danger to Akko but her oldest travelling companion? And what was one measly ghost against a cockatrice, or Croix's missile, or Finnelan when she was angry, or any of the other things she went up against? She bested those odds. Sometimes it was skill. Most of the time it was luck. But all of the time, it boiled down to one simple fact of life.

"I'm not going to give up!" Akko planted her fists on her hips. "I'm going to fix this, and get rid of that ghost once and for all! Diana's one of my best friends, and if she's counting on me, I'm going to help her no matter what!"

The genuine article could barely argue with Akko when her mind was set on something. The three small parts of her in this room looked almost overwhelmed by the sheer passion in her voice. Whether or not they were convinced to help, she couldn't say, but they certainly were paying attention. But Rose?

Rose looked star-struck.

"You…you really do care, don't you, Akko?" She took a deliberate step closer, right into her personal space. The shorter girl flinched, to her embarrassment. It was just platonic affection. It didn't _mean_ anything. She was just friendly, that was all.

"Y-yeah." Akko said, keeping her voice as firm as possible. "And it's not like I can just ignore her if she's in trouble."

"Akko…" She smiled so warmly at her, Akko's heart skipped a beat. "I always knew you were so heroic and kind, but…to see you in action…"

The praise brought a flush to her cheeks. Akko scratched the side of her head, chuckling to herself. "W-well, I mean, I broke the jar in the first place, so it's not really like I'm really _doing_ anything. Just cleaning up my mess, I guess."

"But you're still saving the day. Like I know you always do." Rose was whispering now.

"I...No, I'm just…fixing stuff. T-that _I_ broke." And now she was whispering back. Why were they whispering? Why were they so close? Why was this whole thing so…so like this?

"Oh, Akko…" Without waiting for her response, Rose reached out and delicately cupped the shorter girl's chin in her fingers. _Very_ intimately.

Her thumb softly brushed against her lower lip. Akko, suddenly frozen to the spot, found herself staring into her eyes. She never even noticed how blue they really were. But then Rose closed them and, as she gently lifted Akko's chin upwards, she began to lean in towards her lips, as if she was going to…

Going to...

To…

Akko burst from the room as fast as her legs could take her. She had practically shoved Rose to the ground to get away, and darted out the door and down the hallway like her life depended on it. She had no idea where she was going, but she ran, turning every corner and going every direction until she was completely out of breath. Which seemed to happen quicker than it usually did. As she slowed to a stop in another sort of lobby, she gasped in deep gulps of air, leaning against the wall.

What kind of platonic affection was _that?!_

She took a deep breath, trying to reclaim her frazzled nerves. Her face was hot, and her head was all out of sorts. Some mental Diana just tried to kiss her. On the lips. With her actual mouth. She _definitely_ was missing something now. She just needed to think for a second.

…Maybe it was a European thing? Akko was Japanese, so for all she knew, trying to kiss someone full on the mouth was just a way of saying hello here in the west. She…hadn't seen much examples of it, but it made sense in her head. At least it did when compared to the alternative.

Or no, more likely was that it was an _aristocratic_ European thing. Guys like Andrew probably did mouth to mouth all the time just to greet each other at fancy dinner parties, and what would Akko know about any of that hoighty-toighty stuff?

She looked around, and a groan escaped her lips. She was hopelessly lost. She hadn't paid any attention to where she was going, and now she had no idea where she was, and she doubted she could even remember how to get back. And as she took stock of her situation, she gradually covered her face with her palm. She had just shoved Rose. The only person who had actually been willing to help her so far, and she shoved her. Like a jerk. _That_ was smart. What would Akko know indeed.

Akko may be stupid, but she had _some_ self-awareness about that fact, thank you very much.

Like always, she didn't have a clue what she was doing. Someone was relying on her expertise, but she was less of a competent witch and more of a randomized collection of eccentric skills and near-death experiences. She was just running around like she lost her head, even when one of her best friends was at a real risk of losing hers. If she needed more reasons why Diana obviously wouldn't think of her that way, here she was. Doing what she always did.

…She was wasting time. She shook the thoughts from her head, trying to bring back her focus. The moodiness hadn't exactly come out of nowhere, but it always seemed to sneak up on her whenever she compared herself to others, especially to her, and then it just made everything worse. She never got anywhere by dwelling on her doubts, dwellable as they were.

Whatever thoughts Diana did or didn't have about her, or was repressing…none of it really mattered right now. She could hate her guts and it wouldn't make a difference to her resolve. Akko wasn't lying when she said she was going to save her, and neither of them had time for her to be acting like this. She picked herself off the wall, figuring she had to get by on her own for now. In any case, she was in another lobby, but it was smaller than the one she started in. There was no secretary this time, thankfully, but she wasn't alone either.

Another Diana was laying across three separate chairs, fast asleep. Her appearance was shockingly casual. She was wearing an oversized grey hoodie and black sweatpants, and both looked very baggy and loose. Her hair was tied up in a haphazard bun, and even asleep, there were dark circles under her eyes. Had it been anyone else but the ever dignified Cavendish heiress, Akko might've suspected it was the way she looked when she rolled out of bed.

Akko poked the girl in the side, earning an annoyed groan, but not much other response. "So you're sleeping. I don't suppose you're the original Diana?"

She heard a light laugh from behind her, the kind of subdued chuckle that sounded natural to the refined Cavendish voice. "Oh no, that's Slothful Diana. She, of course, represents Diana's desire to simply sleep and lounge. Though I doubt anyone could blame you for not recognizing her, considering how rarely she is released."

This new Diana walked up to her, with her hands calmly folded behind her back. She was wearing a soft red trench coat and turtleneck sweater, with a strange, green jeweled necklace. She also had a large witch hat, but as opposed to being pointy, it was rounded on top. That had been what gave away where Akko had seen the outfit before. She recognized it, but the real one (and the person who wore it) were much shorter.

"Hey, you're dressed kinda like…" Akko stood and pointed to her, and the newcomer just smiled knowingly.

"Ah, yes. I am dressed as Headmistress Miranda Holbrooke of Luna Nova Academy." She explained, in a matter-of-fact tone. "I am, of course, the abstract representation of the value Diana places on knowledge, and Diana regards the Headmistress as one of the smartest people she knows. Of course, it must be noted that there is a great sum of knowledge Headmistress Miranda Holbrooke does _not_ know, as quite simply even with her age and expertise there is no one that has knowledge of all things. However despite this caveat, my appearance manifests in a representation of hers for more symbolic purposes."

"Uh."

That was…a _lot_ of words, and Akko didn't get the majority of them. But she did catch a lot of 'knows' and 'knowledge' in there. "So…are you like knowledge…able Diana?"

She nodded. "I suppose that's an approximate shortening of my actual title, which is officially Diana Who is Knowledgeable. As previously stated, I represent the value placed on knowledge and the retaining of information. In any case, I am on a walk on this section of the psyche in order to catalog the circumstances of the Repression Wing and create a better sense of self-identity, as such information is valuable to a mind construct as experienced as myself."

Okay, so this one was _super_ long-winded. Apparently, when you were smart, and only smart, you really didn't care much about how much was too much. But as unrestrained as she was, Akko was still in dire need of help, and some information could be useful. "So if you know all this…do you know about the ghost?"

She arched a brow. "Ghost?"

"The one trying to take over. I came in here to stop it. Something like Fayway or Faywon…"

"Faiwu?"

"Yeah! Faiwu, that's it!" Akko snapped her fingers.

Knowledgeable Diana tapped her chin in thought for a moment, before she smiled and began to explain. "Ah yes, the Phantom of Faiwu, occasionally known as the sealed spirit of deviancy. Faiwu was an individual executed long ago. The exact date is unknown, but it is believed to be several hundred years. It believed its death was unjust, and thusly it returned with a sinister purpose. Faiwu, of course, enacts its vengeance upon mortals by possessing the bodies of females and using them to-"

"Yeah yeah yeah, that's great!" Akko cut off the lecture before it had a chance to continue. "I need to find the original Diana so I can save her from it! Do you know where she is?"

"Ah yes, the original Diana. I do _not_ know what you mean by saving her, but the original is, of course, the core of the entire consciousness, created when the human mind first begins to register independent thought as well as its own existence. It is from this point the entire psyche is built from."

She inhaled, preparing to continue.

Akko threw her head back and groaned.

"Of course, as this core persona represents all conscious thought and self-awareness, it therefore controls all other aspects of the mind to a great degree, which includes individual mind constructs such as myself. It functions as chief executive officer that orders and directs the flow of all the Dianas present within the mind. It is worth noting that the core persona is not omnipotent, as it cannot stop the creation of undesired thoughts and mental constructs even while it can control them. The core, obviously, cannot simply rewrite more persistent mental constructs even if she desired to, as it is nigh impossible to change ones personality on a whim. Certain constructs that represent more passionate emotions are very difficult to control, for obvious reasons."

Akko's eyes gradually glazed over as she tuned out the long winded lecture. Granted, she had been looking for answers, but she could use more _timely_ answers. She lazily tapped her foot, somewhere between bored and annoyed. She didn't even really register the sound of rapidly approaching footsteps until they were right behind her.

And it was about then Akko was tackled to the ground by three Officer Dianas.

Before she could even exclaim in shock, the three were holding her arms down, trying to contain her. The Officers were shouting at her, but it was difficult to pick apart when all the voices were identical. But when two of them managed to hold down her arms, the third stood over her, glaring down with high authority.

"I don't know what kind of strange entity you are," The Officer said, "but if you thought you could escape and cause harm to this mind, you're in for a harsh lesson."

"Harm? What?" Akko gaped. "I'm trying to _help_ her!"

"This mind must always perform to the highest of expectations! That is the way it has always been since the Reformation." The Officer crossed her arms, ignoring her. "Disruptions and distractions have no place in an environment as refined as this."

"Wait wait! Listen to me! You gotta let me-!"

"Save it for the judge." One of the Officers holding her arms silenced her. "The law apply to everyone, and you must pay your dues to society. Your siren ways won't shake our resolve."

Akko frantically looked around the room, as much as she could with the Officer rudely trying to press her face into the carpet. Slothful Diana hadn't stirred. She motioned for Knowledgeable Diana to help her, who seemed to take her distress as a question.

Knowledgeable Diana smiled, with an air of wisdom about her. "Ah yes, Officer Diana is of course a part of the Mental Police force, a representation of the process of self-concept, which is defined as the self-constructed identity formed from beliefs about oneself as well as the responses of others. This means that the Officers enforce the core persona's wishes by maintaining which mental constructs gain control, as well as helping to eliminate undesirable personas and intrusive thoughts in order to protect the psyche. As you are a foreign entity to this mind, you by all technicalities qualify as intrusive."

"You gotta help me out of this!" Akko told her. She was the only one who seemed to be aware of the ghost to any degree. "If I don't get outta here, Faiwu's gonna ruin everything!"

"Oh, I'm Knowledgeable Diana." She said plainly. "You would want Altruistic Diana for that sort of task, who of course represents Diana's innate desires to do good deeds and be helpful to others. I would have no reason to do such a thing without orders from the core, after all."

"No rea-?! Are you out of your mind?!"

The question seemed to confuse her. "By all technicalities, none of us have minds to speak of, as we are non-corporeal constructs that represent the complex and abstract concept of thought and emotional reasoning, and only exist _within_ the context ofa mind."

As weird and European as Rose's platonic affection for her was, she was _really_ starting to miss it. Sure, her friendly hugs leaned too far on the close side, and it messed with Akko's head something fierce, but it was much nicer treatment than actually being manhandled and arrested. The Officers worked together and picked her up from the ground, and began to drag her off by her arms to parts unknown.

"Wait, what's even happening?" Akko asked, struggling futilely against the grip of the three Officers. She looked back to the one dressed as the Headmistress, hoping she would change her mind or view or _whatever_ and give her a hand. The _real_ one wouldn't hesitate to help her, and this one was as much of a part of her as the rest of the people in this head. Naturally, she smiled knowingly.

"Now the obvious answer is, if you are deemed unfitting, undesirable or conflicting to the mental health of the psyche, you will face the same fate as other irrelevant mental constructs and personas. In order to maintain a healthy state of mind, it is of course necessary that we kill off those parts that do not belong."

"What." Akko paled. " _What?!_ They're gonna what?! _"_

One of the Officers wagged her finger at her disapprovingly. "We are _indoors_ right now. Use your indoors voice. Yelling is completely improper behavior."

Knowledgeable Diana matched pace with the Officers dragging Akko away, with an almost excited smile on her face. "This is quite a double edged sword. As much of a shame it will be to lose such an aesthetically pleasing girl, I have never heard of a mind traveler dying inside of another's psyche. Will she simply be removed from the psyche and forced back into the real world? Or will her consciousness truly perish and leave her body in the real world forever comatose and unresponsive? This may be an excellent learning opportunity."

And somehow, this was the state of her life. Being dragged off to face judgement at the threat of capital punishment by self-interested and unwitting mental representations of one of her best friend's emotions as she was trapped within her mindscape trying to exorcise an ancient vengeful ghost attempting to possess her. She grumbled, trying to think of some sort of game plan to get herself out of the latest entry in a long list of things that just seemed to _happen_ to her.

Today, Akko decided, was really not turning out to be a 'Yay' kind of day.

* * *

 _A.N. Oh Akko. One of these chapters will end on less distressing note for you. Oldest travelling companion indeed. Ah well, I'm sure she'll do just fine in court. Maybe you know who will even return to her defense? And in the real episode, there were Angel and Devil Sucys, weren't there?_

 _I like to think that in-between the lines of this self-indulgent trashiness there is a legitimate character study going on. Gallows humor aside, there are some tragic implications in later chapters. Not a lot, it's pretty gay, but it's there. Even now, it says a lot about the type of person she is that things are so much stricter than they were in Sucy's mind. And really, it's not like Akko's gonna figure that out. Here she is with the thought process of that song from Legally Blonde. She is not quite that perceptive._

 _(and just fyi! None of the emotions are being malicious. The original isn't awake to balance and direct them, leaving them just on instinct. The Officers are antibodies that just wanna protect Diana's mind. None of them can tell they're actually being possessed, and Akko is this weird foreign thing that shouldn't be there as far as they know.)_


	4. Akko v The Judicial Branch

Truth be told, Akko wasn't taking this death penalty thing that personally. If she took every time something tried to kill her to heart, she'd be a very bitter person. She wasn't sugar-coating it. The situation still, as a whole, sucked. But she was trying to keep positive, figuring if she panicked, it'd be a lot harder to figure a way out of this.

Judge Diana at least made her smile. She was sitting atop her bench, preparing for the upcoming trial. She had the regal judge's robe, the real Cavendish's piercing gaze, and a bushy white moustache plopped right atop her face. It almost looked fake, for how much it contrasted with her blonde hair. Sure, there was the fact that the Judge will probably try to condemn her, and that's not great, but her appearance was still fun. Seeing such a serious girl with such an ill-fitting accessory helped her mood considerably.

Come to think of it, there were a lot of strange versions of her friend in the courtroom, all in strange manners of dress or strange colorations. The Punctual one she had met first was sitting next to the Judge's bench, scribbling away on her notes. The Slothful one she had 'met' earlier was sitting in the audience with her arms crossed, fast asleep again. Next to the Knowledgeable one, who had followed the Officers in here and sat down to watch, which was _real_ nice of her. The audience was full of others whose roles she couldn't immediately place, but there wasn't any sign of the three she had met in the first Repression room.

The supposedly irrelevant Dianas sitting next to Akko, however, were probably stranger still. Their appearances were somehow more uncharacteristic than any of the ones she had seen. One of them on the far end was wearing a pastiche Godzilla head. Another was scorched, and it looked like the tips of her hair were on fire. And the one sitting to her right was wearing what looked like Jedi robes. They were all sectioned off from the courtroom by a waist high wall, guarded by several Officers. After all, they were the ones on trial, and potentially about to be killed off. The thought of it, for obvious reasons, made Akko uneasy, especially as she looked at how many versions of her friend were next to her.

When they all shared her face, a large part of Akko desperately wanted to free them and keep them from their gruesome fate. But the last time she interrupted this process, those freed Sucys had morphed into a giant mega-Sucy monster that tried to kill the Original and, more incidentally, Akko as well. One supernatural threat to Diana's life was about all she could handle right now, so it was best to leave it alone, as conflicting as it made her heart feel.

Akko lightly elbowed the one in the robes and tunic next to her. She just felt the need to make conversation. "So, what are you in for?"

"In for…?" The girl tilted her head, smiling obliviously. Akko blinked in surprise. The girl's limbs faded around the edges when her body when she moved, like she hadn't fully come into existence. She looked solid when she was still, but in motion she seemed…undeveloped.

Akko shrugged. "I mean, you got a name, right?"

She nodded, and the edges of her face briefly flickered to transparency when she did. "I'm Diana Who thinks we should watch Star Wars."

…Huh. That was something. Akko once asked Diana if she wanted to watch one of the movies with her and the Green Team on Constanze's custom projector. She had said no, politely claiming she had no interest in fantasy movies, but apparently part of her thought about it. For a moment anyway, considering this thought was apparently 'irrelevant.'

Akko looked past her to the next girl in line, who introduced herself as Diana Who likes heated Political Discussions. The real girl didn't like heated discussions of anything. She, and now that Akko looked at it the other convicted Dianas as well, didn't seem to register the danger they were in, with all their disconnected expressions and blank smiles. All the people here were more than a little loopy, but it seemed like these ones in particular hadn't grown into fully developed thoughts yet. Between their names and the way they faded when they moved, they were just spur of the moment fancies.

Next in line was Diana Who is interested in Midwestern fashions, followed by Diana Who wants to spit on people, then Who wants to get into rap, Who says we should give boys another chance (?), Who wants to shout curse words more, Who wants to learn cute Japanese phrases (?), Who thinks Amanda might not be so bad, Who reads fanfiction online, Who wants to burn things ( _?_ ), and finally the one Who likes Kaiju movies, at the far end of the line in the front.

Granted, Akko knew the real Cavendish would hate a lot of those things, and a couple of them sounded like legitimately terrible ideas, but still, the fact they were condemned was profoundly sad. When they all looked like someone she cared about as much as she did, it was hard not to feel for them even when she knew this fatal mess was, by all technicalities, a healthy process. And again, the only thing keeping her from acting was that a giant mega-Diana monster would be no help to anyone right now. Did Akko's own mind do this same thing? It was strange to imagine.

Before she could think on it further, yet _another_ two versions freely entered the courtroom, striding to the front. They seemed a bit like lawyers, since they had briefcases and set up on the tables by the Judge. The two newcomers were largely identical.

…Well, more so than usual at least. They wore identical three piece business suits and ties, with designs of wings stitched into the back. Except one of them had a solid white suit, with a halo above her head, and the other's suit was completely blood red, with similarly colored horns protruding from her hair. They must be her Shoulder Angel and Devil, respectively. Except…normal sized.

It was almost a shame. Seeing the tiny little flying Sucys back then was actually kind of funny, but these two were just Diana's normal form with accessories. She _could_ be a stick in the mud sometimes. Almost figures some of her uninhibited mind-people would be comparatively reserved as well.

If these ones were lawyers, that might actually work out for her. The devil and the angel in Sucy's head had largely only been interested in the state of Sucy's mind without much regard for Akko's well-being. But then, this was Diana, not Sucy. Akko loved her roommate dearly, but she could be a jerk. Surely a much more compassionate person's good and evil side would be willing to look out for her.

The Shoulder Devil spared single glance towards all the condemned thoughts. "Must we even go through with this formality?" She asked. "The Officers already declared them obstructive and undesirable. They should receive punishment immediately."

The Shoulder Angel shook her head. "We can't just eliminate every obstructive and undesirable thought with no regard." She said. "They should be allowed to say their final words, and _then_ receive immediate punishment."

Why does she even bother hoping for things sometimes?

The Judge slammed her gavel to start their trial. One of the Officers helped the first girl in line to her feet, the one wearing the fake Godzilla head. If she was declared irrelevant by the judge, she was going to be killed off. And it was the same with the rest of them. Even if it was something that by all rights needed to happen. Maybe Akko couldn't save them, not without making everything worse, but that didn't mean she was the type of person to idly sit back and watch when someone was in trouble.

Akko leaned over the waist-high wall, frantically waving at the Judge. "Ooh, ooh! C-can I go first? Please?" She begged childishly. "Judge me first instead!"

The Shoulder Devil eyed her suspiciously. "You're the last in line. Why should we move you to the front? That isn't how this works."

The Angel nodded her head, calmly walking over to talk to Akko face to face. "The prosecution raises a valid point. Is there any reason _why_ we should breach protocol and proceed with this trial out of order?"

"Uh…I mean, why not?" Akko shrugged. "It…doesn't really make a difference if I go before anyone else, does it?" And in truth, it didn't. But if she couldn't do anything to help, she could at least delay it.

The Angel crossed her arms. "If it doesn't make a difference, why request it?" She arched a brow, before her face set in realization. "Oh…are you another Diana inclined towards empathy? You don't wish to see the others condemned?"

Akko blinked. "Actually…yeah. That's exactly it."

"I see." The Angel smiled sympathetically. "I believe such a final request is acceptable. Judge Diana?"

They looked to the Judge for approval, who shrugged indifferently. "Fine, I suppose. As long as we can get this done in a timely manner."

To Akko's satisfaction, the girl wearing the pastiche Godzilla head was returned to the line, and the Officer motioned for her to come forward in her stead, though clearly just as confused as to the point of the switch as the Judge was. On the one hand, she had just given up extra time to think of a solid plan to get out of this, which meant she was going in by the seat of her pants. But on the other, it _felt_ like the right thing to do, so she had to do it.

Even without a plan, she felt a little more confident as she was led before the Judge's bench. If _anyone_ would know why she had been sent here and what was at stake, it would be the one whose job it was to be smart and objective, wouldn't it? Surely this one thing could work out for today.

"Well?" The Judge arched a brow. "State your name for the court."

"I'm…Akko?" She smiled brightly, feeling hopeful for some sympathy.

"I've never heard of an Akko. Therefore, it cannot be something that belongs in this mind." She raised her gavel. "Irrelevant!"

Akko darted her hand underneath the gavel to stop the verdict-deciding impact. She succeeded, mostly because it smashed down on her fingers instead. Akko bit her lip, trying not to cry out.

"Gkk! W-wait." She winced in pain. She needed to think of a lie, or at least something to save her skin, and fast. "I was kidding. I'm…uh…Diana Who likes to Shapeshift! Into her platonic friends!"

The Judge's eyes narrowed. "So…you're somehow back again. Well, no matter what temptress form you take, the verdict stands the same! Irrelevant!"

Brushing her hand aside, the Judge slammed the gavel down, the noise echoing throughout the room. Akko groaned. She barely understood law at the best of times, but that _hardly_ seemed like a trial. The Officers that led her here made a move to apprehend her, and in turn Akko prepared to resist. These mind people were way too grabby, and she wasn't about to go down with a fight. Before they could confront her, the courtroom doors suddenly burst open with a deafening sound.

Rose was standing in the doorway, breathing heavy. The audience gasped and murmured at the sudden intruder. The various Officers across the room let out exasperated (almost fearful?) moans.

"Not her _again_ …" The Officer nearest to Akko whined, with shoulders slumped. Rose shared a brief look with a bewildered Akko, before her pleading eyes locked onto the Judge.

"I can't let you do this! I can't let you do anything to harm her!" She cried out. "I…I love her!"

Akko hid in her palms, her face growing red hot. She did _not_ just run into a courtroom and shout that. Because it made it sound _really_ romantic, way more than Akko had a clue how to deal with. Capital punishment almost sounded appealing.

From the corner of her eye, she saw the Judge shaking off her shock, replacing it with an irritated glare. Her grip tightened around her gavel, and she called out angrily to the girl intruding on her precious trial.

"What do you think _you're_ doing here, Diana Who is in love with Akko!? Are you attempting to cause mayhem again?"

Akko was struck by a sudden coughing fit. The Judge called her…? Rose's name was…was actually…? Diana Who is in love with…?

Oh.

That wasn't platonic affection. That wasn't platonic at all. That was...that was the other thing. Oh _no._

…Well, it didn't mean anything, right? There…there was no way the real Diana had any feelings for her. Akko had met Rose in the Repression Ward. She was probably just…a spur of the moment thought. Everyone's thought about their friends in a romantic context once with no intention of ever doing anything, it just happens. Just some weird thought people occasionally had about their friends.

Punctual Diana tutted at Rose. "She's always interfering with the schedule. Very inconvenient."

Always? _Always_ interfering with the schedule? But that would mean that she's been here a while. And everyone here clearly recognized her. How long has she…? And how long has the real one…? Did that mean these were real feelings? That Diana legitimately….? It still didn't, right? Maybe she was making a mistake? She just needed to slow down, get her bearings, and-

"You have not been cleared to leave the Repression Wing today!" The Judge said. "Must you always act so uncivilized? Breaking out at inopportune times, overpowering other emotions, can't you just wait for clearance like everyone else? You're affecting the objectivity of this mind!"

"W-would you all just stop?!" Akko yelled out. "Just give me a second to think about this!"

Her face went back into her palms. This was the weirdest way to find out a girl had a crush on her. And Diana had a crush on her! On _her!_ What does she even _do_ with this? When she wakes them both up, she's going to have to look her in the eye and talk to her. And all this time, she had these sorts of feelings for her. How long has this been here?

"If…if you hurt her, it would be _devastating_." Rose pleaded. "Not just to me! I _know_ she's even important to the Original! If something happens to her, it would hurt all of us beyond belief! You have to let her go!"

The Angel was unconvinced. "My sincerest apologies, but I find that hard to believe." She said. "Why would Diana Who likes to Shapeshift into her Platonic Friends have any profound effect on the state of mind?"

Rose bristled. "Her _name_ is Akko."

The Angel seemed to consider this implication for a moment, but before she could say anything, the Judge frowned, having had enough of all this chaos in her courtroom. "Well, clearly, _one_ of those names is a lie, but it makes no difference. Either way, she was deemed irrelevant!"

The sound of the gavel snapped Akko back to the reality of her situation. She had been so caught up with the whole… _that,_ she had completely forgotten about the imminent mortal peril she was in. The Officers began to close in, but she had no intention of being condemned. She'd worry about Rose later. It was well past time for her to save her own skin.

Before anyone of them could get close, Akko had jumped on top the Judge's bench, snatching the gavel from her hands. The courtroom was, predictably, shocked by her sheer disregard for the rules as she stood tall in front of the Judge with her hand on her hip. Her eyes scanned the crowd of confused and indignant personas with a determined glare.

"Alright, everybody listen to me!" Akko gestured to the courtroom with the gavel. "You're all crazy! Every one of you! Completely bonkers! But you're all still Diana, just split into a hundred pieces and with your crazy level turned _way_ too high!"

"What in the world are you…?" The Judge began to ask, only for Akko to brandish the gavel as though it were a weapon. The Judge retracted her question.

"Let me finish." She said plainly, before raising her voice once more to address the court. "I know, somehow, you guys make up the _real_ Diana, and the real Diana would actually listen and help me out here. You guys need to just…I don't even know, work together and help me figure this out!"

Somewhere in this place, beneath all this raw emotion and possession and _whatever_ , was her friend, the real version of her. If she could just get them to listen enough to focus, maybe she could bring her out, get through to her consciousness, and get some semblance of control over what was going on.

Whatever shock the room felt at her audacious actions was wearing off, and they clearly weren't listening to her. The Officers began to approach the desk, glaring daggers into her. Rose was getting hysterical, and tears were falling from her eyes. The audience clamored, and the Angel and the Devil started shooting contradictory reprimands. Not that she could hear any of it. Their shouts mingled through the air.

"Come on!" Akko tried to speak over all the chaos. "You guys need to listen to me!"

"Get down from there! You can't be-!"

"This is a complete breach of conduct and you-!"

"You shouldn't-!"

"Don't hurt Akko! How dare you threaten-!"

"This doesn't fit into the schedule at all. Don't you have a sense of-?"

"Ah, this is not proper-"

It was becoming more and more clear that her presence here seemed to just make everything worse. This was just nuts. It was literally raw emotions butting heads with each other. She couldn't break through to anyone. She was tired, confused, and embarrassed all at once, and she really just wanted to fix this and get out of here. Unsure of what else to do at this point, she took a deep breath and just shouted.

" _Diana! Listen to me!"_

At first nothing happened. And then the room somehow…shifted.

She wasn't even sure what else to call it. All the Officers, the Judge, Rose, every single version of the Cavendish girl just slowed, stopped in their tracks, like some realization just set over them. There was a strange sensation settling atop the room that all of them seemed to sense, a feeling completely lost on Akko. They murmured to themselves, before slowly, they turned their focus back to the girl standing on the bench. But all their conflict disappeared.

They were just…calmed. It was if all their anger and anxiety was just sedated, and all the raw emotions were suddenly balanced and directed. And somehow, this bizarre sense of calm seemed to center on Akko. Even the very architecture of the room seemed to, just for a moment, shift to center on Akko.

She mumbled to herself. "O…kay?"

"…Peculiar." The Devil looked up at her sideways. "She's clearly a breach in protocol, and yet…she no longer feels…"

The Judge looked around, as if searching for the answer in the room. "Did that…sensation come from the Original? But there wasn't any words…"

"I didn't _receive_ any conscious orders…" One of the Officers said. "But…it _felt_ like…"

"Yes...it did…" The Angel agreed. "But there was a feeling of…"

Utterly confused, Akko looked to Rose. The girl didn't look madly in love, or about to cry, or anything high-strung. Rose was just…benignly regarding her. Akko shifted on her feet. She had never felt so uncomfortable being the center of attention. She had meant to try to call out to the real version of her friend. Did it…work? Her plans don't usually work. They weren't acting like the real person like she had hoped, but they all had calmed down significantly. So…what in the world was going on?

The Devil squinted at her. "What _are_ you? What did you do?"

Akko shrugged helplessly. "Don't ask _me_ what happened. You're the brain people, you tell me."

The Devil's expression flattened, and she turned to the Judge. "If she can inspire this sort of emotional reaction, we should be rid of her immediately. She could be the beginning of some manner of mental illness. It is your solemn duty to preserve our objective reasoning, and she…she inhibits it, somehow."

The Angel, however, shot Akko a quick glance. "I disagree." She said to the Judge. "I haven't any idea what that thing was, but it came from the core and it centered on her. There are clearly strange circumstances going on, and harming her could very well damage the psyche."

"You can't be serious." The Devil gaped at her. "She clearly causes conflict in this mind. She is literally standing on the Judge's podium, threatening her with her stolen gavel."

"That may be so, but she's of _some_ importance to the Original, otherwise that reaction, whatever it was, would not have happened. She doesn't belong, but for as problematic as she is the Original clearly doesn't regard her as malignant. We _need_ more conscious guidance for this."

"The Original is not responding." Punctual Diana informed her. "I believe we are asleep right now, but no one's been able to make even subconscious contact. I've been informed not even the dream department knows what's happening."

Akko tried to keep the exasperation from her voice. "That's because you're being possessed. Like I've been _trying_ to _tell_ you people all day."

The Devil sneered at her. "There are no foreign entities in this mind but _you._ " She snapped.

Akko just pinched the bridge of her nose, biting back a sigh."You guys don't know because the stupid ghost keeps freezing you. Because it's trying to take over everything." She said flatly. "Like I've been _saying._ "

From behind her feet, the Judge scoffed. "Please. We run a highly renowned and disciplined psyche. I think if we were being possessed, we would kn-"

And then the ghostly wailing started once more. Faiwu's ethereal voice filled the air, and its moan was longer and even more frustrated than the one back in the room, trying once more to claim the mind after whatever it was the Original had done. The room actually shook, and Akko fell from atop the bench with a loud yelp.

A quick glance as she got up however, revealed that the rest of the courtroom was frozen in time. The Judge, along with several other personas, were still looking where Akko had been standing, each and every one deathly still. In a room with upward of thirty people, she was the only one moving. Creepy as it was, it gave her a chance to get out of here. Between this freezing and whatever that calm thing was, she needed more than a little time to collect her thoughts.

As she stopped in the doorway, she turned around, looking at the all the various versions of the girl she knew, unwittingly paralyzed in place. Her eyes lingered on Rose most of all. Akko pursed her lips. "Bonkers." She decided. "But you're still Diana, aren't you?"

By the time the wailing finally stopped, and any of them would begin to move again as though nothing happened, Akko was long gone from the courtroom.

She started walking, taking care to avoid being seen by anyone else, though it seemed everyone who was out in the mind was back in the audience. The hallways outside actually resembled an official government building, which was somehow both expected and unexpected. The polished and reflective linoleum tiles, the pillars built into the walls, and the whole white, bronze, and gold color scheme, everything in here gave off an impression of fanciness and worldliness, which made sense given whose mind this was. It _didn't_ make sense how this somehow connected into a regular office building, but it wasn't a real place anyway. She still had plenty of other nonsensical things to occupy her thoughts with.

Her mind kept drifting back to Rose. The whole thing about Diana being in…blah-blah with her was just confusing. She didn't know how she felt about it. It wasn't that she didn't think Diana was attractive. She was undeniably pretty, and her angular features were sculpted and classically beautiful. Not to mention she was extremely smart and talented. And also tall. Akko could admit that she was attractive. She had eyes, after all. And Akko also knew that she liked both guys and girls in about the same way, so that wasn't her issue with this idea.

…These thoughts were building to a "but". She was having trouble thinking of a counter-argument. Really, the only reason she could think of for why she _didn't_ have crush on Diana was because it would've been wishful thinking.

So a part of her friend blah-blah'd Akko, but she was repressing it. Akko saw that in the most literal way possible. But she didn't know why. Did Diana simply hold everything back, or did she not want those feelings at all? Akko criticized her more than once for being a very guarded person, so it wasn't unreasonable to think she'd keep everything close to the chest.

But on the other hand, it wasn't like Akko was that great a catch either, especially to someone like Diana, who could get anyone she wanted. Because she was pretty, and smart, and talented, and also tall, and Akko was pretty sure no one would describe her as any of those things. So her trying to squash those feelings would't be that shocking. What _would_ she see in her?

She growled at her own thoughts. She _never_ used to feel bad about her looks or how attractive she was, but she never tried to imagine measuring up either. What _was_ it about Diana that seemed to bring out these insecurities? Did it mean she liked her back? And even if she did, so what? She still didn't have an actual answer. Maybe Diana was too closed off to ever say it, or maybe she didn't want to feel that way in the first place. That was a huge difference, and she didn't know what to do. All this emotional mess was making a mess of _her_ emotions. She had no idea how to deal with any of this.

No one in her life had ever thought about her in that way. The closest she's ever come was the lovelove bee, and that night was…distressing. She had spent the entire party freaking out and running away and making bad decisions. Even more than usual. It was even worse, because that was when Diana actually acted crazy with her. She had outright confessed to her, and she said she loved her in front of everyone and she tried chasing her down and she was wearing that really pretty dress and you know what this _really_ wasn't helping to clear anything up.

She stopped walking and, with a huff and an arm cross, fell back against the wall. She didn't know how this changed things, or even if she _wanted_ it to change things, and she still had no idea why Rose was in the Repression Wing in the first place. What she wouldn't give for an easy fix for all this to all this…this thinking.

Her attention was caught by a large wooden door in the middle of the hallway. There were signs all around it, warning not to open it, not to touch it, and not even to get close to it. Thick chains were crossed across the door, joined by a single padlock. There was a label above the forbidden door, written in bold red letters. The door quite literally read:

" _Secrets"_

* * *

 _A.N._

 _*someone tries to kill her*  
_ _Akko: Understandable. That's fair  
_ _*Pretty girl likes her*  
_ _Akko: ? hwat the hlel?_

 _I didn't even mean to do her in like this. I promise next chapter has some fluff. It's some goddamn weird fluff that could only happen in this kind of story, but I think it's sorta cute once you get past how bizarre it is. And we'll see that, and what exactly Akko is going to choose to do now. I hope you guys like it, since you're all entirely too nice to me._

 _(Also, the bit with the irrelevant thoughts being less 'real' isn't really from the episode, but a headcanon. Psychologically, it makes sense, since they're all essentially just whims had throughout the day, so of course they're less physical than something as meaningful as a crush. The next chapters play with the opposite idea, with traits that have been around so long and defined so much of the personality it would be impossible to repress them. Knowledgeable Diana is one of these. The repressed emotions end up as a middle class that could go either way, though we'll learn more later)_


	5. Headache Heartache or Whatever

It wouldn't even be that hard. It was a single padlock, it wouldn't take long to break at all, if she wanted to. And of course she wanted to. She _had_ said she and Diana should be more honest with each other, and with Rose's existence, there was clearly something being left off the table. She never had a clue she could feel that way, and it was obvious by now she would never tell Akko to her face, but she also hadn't yet given much reason why. Which meant Akko wasn't going to get the answers she wanted in real life. If there was anywhere to get them, it would be here.

All the personas and Officers and every other fruit filled nutcase in this mental and mental world was back in the courtroom. As far as they would know, Akko had been standing on the bench one second and then was gone without a trace the next. Which meant no one knew where she was right now and no one was going to stop her from opening this. She was going to get this question solved, one way or another.

And really, it was a door literally labeled secrets. How could she resist?

She reached over and pulled on the padlock. Secure, but not all that sturdy. Wouldn't keep someone particularly dedicated out, now would it? She briefly wondered if this was the right thing to do, but she erased the doubts from her mind. She was dedicated to figuring out why Diana was hiding her feelings. Because ever since they became friends, they kept trying _not_ to do that, and to let each other know how they feel. Because that's what friends did, they were honest with each other. And Akko always tried to live up to that on her end of their formerly antagonistic relationship.

She didn't try to pretend she was something she wasn't around her if she could help it anymore. Before she at least defended herself or got into one-sided shouting matches where she pretended like she knew what she was doing while Diana tried in vain to convince her she didn't. But nowadays she _let_ herself feel down around her. She wasn't afraid to admit when she didn't know what she was doing or felt more down in the dumps. And she never thought much about it in the moment, because they were friends and they didn't judge each other for that sort of thing. Maybe the fact she let herself look more like a mess around her was another drop in the 'she repressed her feelings because she didn't want them' bucket, but that wasn't the point.

The point was, honesty was a two way street. Akko let _her_ know how she was feeling and what was going on, but Diana was always being closed off. She apparently had hundreds of repression rooms in this crazy place. And for how much she had already loosened up with Akko, she kept a lot of things hidden. In Akko's mind, that felt a little unfair. She wanted them to be closer friends, but there was clearly a lot of feelings being kept secret, and that was going to make things really awkward. She hadn't meant to find out about this, but she knew _now_ , and if she didn't know the full story, how was she going to be able to just sweep it under the rug and talk to her like nothing happened?

And this was about Diana's secret feelings for _her_ , anyway. Akko didn't know she had them in the first place, but there must be a good reason she was hiding them. And whatever that reason was, either something simple or something more serious, it was behind this door. And if it was about her, she had a right to know, didn't she?

Though, now that she thought about it, breaking into places without permission, fun as it usually was, also usually led to her almost facing expulsions, explosions, or both. Her admittedly easily influenced curiosity in the Archives was why she was here in the first place. Akko was under no delusions that she was a smart person, but she _could_ learn after making the same mistake one or five times. If this place was locked away, there was a possibility that it was locked for a reason. Maybe she shouldn't open it without making sure it was okay.

Ah, but Diana _said_ she trusted her, so it should be fine to go looking. She basically _had_ permission already.

It was pretty easy to break the padlock. It wasn't like anyone inside of her own mind had reason to go poking around in there. It was honestly stranger that it was locked at all, besides the formality of it. Her heart raced in her chest as she cracked the door open, inch by inch. She could hear voices inside, though it sounded less like anyone in the room and more like recordings.

She recognized Diana's voice playing in a couple places in there, some of it younger, some surprisingly distressed. She could also hear Anna, her maid, but that was the only other one that immediately jumped out at her. There were a lot of voices she couldn't place. She heard an older man talking to someone named Bernadette, a lot of official sounding people who spoke with authority, some other big wigs and stuffed shirts babbling about something she had no concept of. She heard nothing about Akko in the immediate vicinity, but maybe it was just deeper inside. She prepared to throw open the door completely and go prowling for answers. Only one thing slowed her down.

Diana said she trusted her.

That…wouldn't have happened more than a few months ago. They didn't used to like each other much at all. Akko thought her a snot and Diana thought her an idiot. But after quite a lot of stupid arguments and life-threatening adventures, and a pretty long time, they became good friends. And when it came to her friends, Akko was a hugger. After all, if you wanted to show your friends how much you loved them, what better way than to get up close and give a good squeeze? But Diana tended to be uncomfortable with it, and generally asked her not to. She was starting to question the reasons _why_ she always refused, but the point was she (usually) didn't hug her. She tried to respect her boundaries. That's what friends did, wasn't it?

Akko was a hugger. Diana was a reserved, private person. They knew that about each other, almost implicitly. And they cared for how the other felt. It had taken a lot of time and effort, but they grew on each other and Akko had no doubt they both valued that friendship. Clearly they didn't know everything about each other, but they knew a lot more than they had before. That trust they had, it would've been built out how well they knew each other, how much they cared about each other's safety and comfort. It was born out of a mutual respect that had taken them months to build.

This…was a pretty good way to betray her trust…wasn't it?

Her fingers were still wrapped around the doorknob, and with just a gesture she could open the door all the way. But she couldn't bring herself to do it. She may have learned some things about Diana during this escapade inside her noggin, but _that_ fell under trust. Deliberately sneaking in and running her fingers through her private thoughts did not. There was a difference between overhearing a private conversation and stealing someone's diary.

The door was still open just a crack. She couldn't make out the exact words, but she could hear the voices mingling inside. It was just _so_ tempting to throw it open and get what she wanted. It would take no effort on her part. She gave one longing look to the gap, and with a sigh, pushed the door securely shut and walked away.

She realized she might never know whether she was repressing her feelings because she didn't want them or not. If Diana wanted to tell her about _that_ when she got out of here, that would be on her. If not, Akko would just have to respect her boundaries and just…accept not ever getting an answer to this.

So here she was, not being selfish and doing the right thing. Shouldn't she get _some_ gratification out of it? Because not getting a straight answer on how not straight Diana was for her really sucked. But in the end, she spent most of her life missing crucial information and having revelations sail over her head. She could live with one more.

She passed by another couple doors, each of them locked as tight, but didn't bother to read what was behind any of them. No need to tempt herself any more after all. Trying to do the right thing was an exhausting process.

Though, something made her stop in her tracks. She sniffed the air. There was a smell wafting from one of the doors, one that reminded her of a gym or a place where sports players gather. She knew she shouldn't open it, but it was the strangest sensation in an otherwise very neutral environment. Her curiosity got the better of her, and she turned to, if nothing else, read the label.

" _Fantasies"_

Akko turned and walked decidedly in the other direction. That would be _way_ more information about her friend than she ever needed to know.

She was getting sort of side-tracked, wasn't she? She wasn't quite sure why, but there was the distinct feeling of forgetting something. All that courtroom drama and feeling insecure about herself, and the whole thing with Rose's real name of course, had left her feeling a bit distracted. She should probably get back to what she was doing before she got arrested which was-

"Wait! Shoot!" Akko realized, slapping her forehead. "I completely forgot about the whole saving Diana's life thing!"

Oooh, that's not good. She was pretty sure time was of the essence, wasn't it? It sure sounded urgent when she described it in the Archives. Here she was worrying about her friend's probably unrequited crush instead of the actual dead thing eating her brain or stealing her brain or doing _something_ to her brain that was not a preferable thing.

She set off running to find the Original before it was too late. No more distractions for her. Nothing was going to stop Akko Kagari!

* * *

Akko Kagari stopped. She looked around, and made an official proclamation.

"I am completely lost."

It wasn't even her fault she was wasting time. How was she supposed to find her way around this crazy building? Everyone here literally came into existence inside this place, so there weren't any signs or maps just lying around to help a poor mind-fixer-person find her way. It didn't help that she was deliberately making an effort to avoid where she heard footsteps, lest she get accosted by Officers again.

She groaned, and tried to think of what to do next. Maybe she could double back, but then, she still had no idea which way was closer to the core. She could keep going blindly, but she ran the risk of running into some other threat to her life or to her attention span, both of which probably wasted time. She didn't want to poking around, because now doing so left a bad taste in her mouth when she considered it could hurt the real Diana's feelings.

Just as she was considering recruiting another persona for help, she felt a hand tugging at her skirt. She looked down to see-

…Oh _no._ Akko bit her fingers to keep from making any stupid noises. Tugging at her skirt was a Diana who looked like she was just six years old. Even behind the chubby cheeks and big blue eyes, her face easily recognizable, but suddenly much more adorable. She wore a simple blue collared dress, with poofy white sleeves and a pleated skirt, and seemed unabashedly pleased when she got the teenager's attention.

"Hello." The young little girl folded her hands behind her back politely, smiling upwards. "Are you a new Diana? I haven't seen you before."

"O-oh no, I'm not a-! My name's Akko." She bent down, hands on her knees, to better look the little girl in the eye (and how often did _she_ get to be the taller one?). "Are you her Inner Child or something?"

The little girl's face brightened. "Yes. That's right," She nodded, playfully bouncing on her toes. "Your hair is really pretty."

"Aw! Thank you!" Akko couldn't help but giggle. It was sort of an odd thing to hear after that whole thing with Rose, but this was just a little kid being nice, nothing more than that.

"How come you're here if you're not a Diana?"

"The real one told me to come in! I'm trying to help her!"

She tilted her head curiously. "Why?"

She debated telling the kid about the ghost, but wondered if it wouldn't scare her. Akko had never seen such a bright and carefree expression on that face, even when it was quite a number of years younger looking. "Because we're friends. She's got a problem and I used magic to go in here and help fix it! I _am_ a pretty amazing witch, after all."

"Oh." She said simply, but her eyes shined nonetheless. "You sound like a really nice witch. Are you really good at fixing things?"

Akko couldn't help but grin. "Aw…I don't know about that…" A thought struck her. "What are you doing here anyway? Are you lost, too?"

In response, the little girl shook her head. "I'm okay. I know where I'm going. I was here since the Reformation." She pronounced the word very deliberately, clearly having heard it spoken many times and knowing how to use it, but somewhat inexperienced with all the syllables. And Akko realized she heard it spoken here as well.

"The Reformation? I think I heard that name when I got arrested..." She said, somewhat in disbelief that this was a sentence that came out of her mouth. "What is that anyway?"

While the Child's bright expression didn't completely fade, there was nonetheless a glint of something else in her eyes as the corners of her lips twitched. "That's when mother died."

There…really wasn't anything she could say in response.

The Child seemed to take her stunned silence as a sign to explain, so she did the best she could. "Ever since mother died, the Original told everyone we have to be a grown-up brain. That's when the re-" She paused, weighing the word in her head. "R-repress'n rooms started coming, and they locked everyone up and everyone acted really seriously all the time. They made lots of rules, and they don't like it when Dianas go out without permission. The only ones who get to go out all the time are the core emotions. Except for me, because the Original gets mad when I get out."

That certainly painted a pretty picture. She always knew Diana as a strict rule-follower, but to hear that she forced it onto her own head…It wasn't uncharacteristic, or even surprising. It was just odd to hear it explained in such a childish voice. She knew her mom had passed away, but not when. She wondered how old she must've been when she made these decisions.

"Why did she do all that?" Akko asked.

The Child hummed, searching for an answer. She didn't seem all that dour, though given the other people Akko had seen here so far, she supposed she was simply too childish to really feel that strongly. Absent-mindedly, the little girl began to walk, swinging her arms wide.

The little girl spoke as Akko matched her pace. "She said it had to happen because we had to be a true Cavendish. When they had the Reformation, they had a lot of trials. Even some of the core emotions had to go. Some of the Dianas I knew went and then they didn't come back. And everything changed really fast. This whole place used to look like our house, but now a lot of it is a work building."

Akko glanced around at the environment. Where they were walking looked like a fancy, no-nonsense government building. And it fit right alongside the neutral office space she started in. "So this place really became a police state, huh?"

The Child looked up to her, genuinely confused. "But the police ladies were always here, even back when all the Dianas looked like me."

"Oh, uh no, I mean, there's just lots of rules here, and everyone's acting crazy all the time. Don't you guys ever let up around here?"

The Child skipped across the tiled floor, taking care not to set foot on the lines. "They've let up a little. I get to go out more sometimes now. They still tell us we have to act like grown-ups, but I think the police ladies stopped being so angry."

"They used to be worse?" Akko gaped at her. The idea that all the craziness she had been dealing with since she set foot in here was an improvement was not an encouraging idea.

The Child nodded. "The Original still wants us to be serious all the time. She doesn't like it if we make ourselves look silly. She says we have to follow our…reputation." She struggled a bit with the longer word. "But they let more Dianas out of the repress'n rooms now. The Original still has lots of rules, but she doesn't get as mad when people break them. I think she's more happy now."

"She is?"

"I think so. Like I've said, they let out more emotions now, even some of the ones she used to say were bad. Plus when the Original feels happy, this whole place gets really bright and it makes everyone feel good. She's been doing it a lot more."

"And what happened?" There was a clear excitement in Akko's voice. If there was one thing she prized, it was seeing her friends happy. "What made her change so much?"

"I dunno." The child shrugged plainly. "It just sort of happened a couple of months ago."

"You…don't know? At all?"

The answer was far from satisfying. If she could figure out what it was that made her a happier person, then maybe she could help her smile and open up more in the future. But then, she already decided it wasn't cool of her to go digging around in her friend's head. It'd be hypocritical to keep prying, even if she wanted to.

It would just have to end up being yet another thing about this place she'd never know, another question she'd never get an answer to. Still, the Child obviously knew a lot about the Original, and she could use some directions before anything else crazy happened. She opened her mouth and prepared to ask the little girl where to go to next.

And it was about then Akko was tackled by Rose.

She probably would've hit the ground if Rose had not actually lifted her up and twirled her around. Once her heartrate slowed enough to allow some conscious thought, Akko sighed. How long had she spent here without someone either clinging to her or apprehending her? Like fifteen minutes? Also, could the real Diana lift her like this? She never seemed the type for that sort of upper body strength. That certainly was something to think about.

"Oh, Akko! You're okay!" Rose laughed. "When you disappeared into thin air like that, I was so frightened." She, thankfully, set her down, though this was not the same as letting go of her.

Akko fought off the urge to let out an embarrassed chuckle. "I…I didn't disappear, you were just…" She sighed, figuring it wasn't really worth the effort to explain anymore. It's not like she understood what was going on anyway. "I'm kinda surprised you found me. Didn't the Officers try to stop you? They don't seem to like you."

"They did. But unfortunately for them, love conquers all." She took her hand off the shorter girl's arms, if only to shake her hand limply through the air. As if trying to shake the pain off of her knuckles. Why would her knuckles hurt? Was she implying she…?

Akko was somewhere between flattered and terrified.

A gentle realization seemed to set over Rose. "Oh, but… _you_ don't feel the same as the Officers, do you?"

Akko tilted her head. "What do you mean?"

"Well…you did call us crazy." Rose tapped her chin. "And it's a little like how the Original used to get so angry with us and pushed us back in our rooms. And you _do_ keep running away. Do you not think we should be outside either?"

"Um…" Oh come on. That was a loaded question if ever there was one. She was asking it completely innocently, too. Obviously Akko didn't want to see anybody unhappy, but she definitely wasn't prepared to answer whether or not she was on board with someone having a crush on her. Though it didn't necessarily mean in _that_ context. She tried to ignore any and all romantic connotations. The Reformation business, whatever it was, sounded pretty unhappy, and whatever made Diana let up, she should definitely focus more on that, not on some crush.

"…No." Akko said at last. "I don't think people should lock everything up. There's no reason you gotta act like you can't tell your friends how you're feeling. Maybe some of it is…really embarrassing, but if it's part of you, you shouldn't have to keep it hidden _all_ the time, right?"

"Do you think so?" The Child asked. "The Original made it sound like that was a little kid thing to do."

Akko rubbed the back of her neck. "W-well, I mean, I'm not that mature or anything, but still. I think acting all perfect and controlled all the time's gotta be exhausting. She apparently found something that makes her happy, and she should keep following that, so she doesn't ever have to worry about it. You all should follow your heart!"

And this was like, her third passionate speech she had given today. She was a roll. The Child seemed to accept this answer, for what it was, nodding along simply. Rose, predictably, was all but swooning by the passion in her voice.

"You know, even before I met you, I've always known in my heart that you were a heroic person who believed in others. Between this and how brave you were when Judge Diana was trying to hurt you, you really are quite fearless, aren't you?"

And this time Akko did let out an embarrassed chuckle. She did _try_ to help people if she could, and with the way life liked to kick her across the floor half the time she could use a little flattery every now and then, but hearing it come from her former rival of all people brought out her bashful side. "Heehee!" She giggled, shrugging helplessly. "I don't know how brave I am, but I guess there's not a lot that can really freak me out anymore, huh?"

Before Akko could say anything else, Rose had leaned over and gently pressed her lips to her cheek. It was such a soft and tender thing, Akko couldn't really do anything but stare at her. She laid her fingers where she had kissed her, and felt her heart flutter.

After a moment, once her mind caught up with her and she registered she had just been kissed, Akko's entire face turned red and she all but jumped out of her skin.

"O-OKAY! HAHA!" Akko said, looking anywhere but at Rose. "We-! You-! T-thank you, but uh…! T-there's children present!"

Thinking quickly, as much as she could at that point, she picked up the Child from the floor and held her at arm's length between her and the girl that straight-up just kissed her. The Child seemed confused at her newfound position as a physical barrier, but since she was already in the air, there was little she could do. Rose frowned at the makeshift shield, but her eyes widened when she realized who she was looking at.

"Oh! You're one of the senior personas." Rose bowed deeply and respectfully. "How do you do?"

"Senior?" Akko arched a brow at the little girl she was holding. "Wait, _you're_ the older one?"

"Yes." The Child smiled, wriggling around in her grip to face her. "Like I said, I've been here since the Reformation. I live at the core, with all the other really old emotions. My room is neighbors with Diana Who loves Magic."

And for the second time in about ten minutes, Akko remembered she had important things she should probably be doing. "Oh right! I need to go to the core! Can you show me where to go?"

"Okay." She hesitated for a moment. "…Can I have a shoulder ride?"

And really, her eyes were so big and she batted her lashes so sweetly, how could Akko say no? She was already holding her anyway. With a small 'hup' she rearranged herself to set the kid on her shoulders, and felt her pushing down her ponytail to sit easier.

She pointed Akko in a direction, and Akko held the kid's legs steady as she set off walking, deliberately choosing not to think on how strange this whole thing was, especially when Rose started walking by her side. From her shoulders, the Child looked down at Rose (and how it annoyed Akko she barely had to look down at all) with predictably childlike curiosity.

"Who are you anyway?" She asked. "Are you new?"

"I've been here a couple of months. I'm Diana Who is in Love with Akko."

"Who's Akko?"

" _She's_ Akko, of course! Who else could she be?"

"Okay. She's nice."

"Nice? Oh, she's the sweetest! She's so kind, and she's always helping others. Isn't she such a wonderful person?"

"Yes. I think she's nice."

The two chatted away, utterly oblivious to the way the increasingly flustered state of their subject matter. Getting a compliment from Diana was one thing, and it certainly was a nice thing mind you, but having two of them talk over her and unabashedly sing her praises like this was sorta kinda completely mortifying. Akko cut into the conversation, her face red hot. "C-could we…not t-talk about me?"

Rose tilted her head, smiling brightly. "What else is there to talk about?"

There…really wasn't anything she could say in response.

And so, Akko walked in silence, trying not to dwell on all the thoughts filling her head. And eventually, the little girl on her shoulders grew bored of talking about the one thing Rose liked to talk about, so she simply hummed to herself and enjoyed the ride. Akko really couldn't deny seeing the dignified heiress as a cheery, happy kid was really adorable.

After a few minutes Rose turned to her with a smile, quite literally, pried one of Akko's hands off the Child's legs for the sake of holding it while they walked. If Akko was at a loss for words before, she definitely had no idea what to say now that wouldn't be mindless stuttering. This whole situation was just getting a bit too intense for her. She was starting to wonder if maybe the real Diana could use a hug more often, because all the ones in her head were really needy for physical contact.

"You don't mind, do you Akko?" Rose asked sweetly.

"I-it's fine." She replied, getting a content sigh in response. She was already holding it anyway, wouldn't be much use fighting it.

So she had a little Diana on her shoulders while another Diana held her hand, except the one holding her hand was actually her repressed feelings for her and was actually younger than the mentally six year old girl she was giving a ride to who was the summation of all her childhood mindsets and fancies. And here Akko thought the most interesting part of her day was going to be poking around in the forbidden Archives to write a boring report.

Life certainly wasn't all that kind to Akko, but she couldn't help but appreciate it always kept her guessing. She probably would've missed this whole encounter if she had gone invading Diana's privacy.

She spared a glance back at the Secrets door. She couldn't deny she still _really_ wanted to open it. Almost more so now, since she learned how much worse things used to be in here and that something changed to make it a brighter place. She was still sticking with her decision to respect her friend. Maybe when she got out of here she could just ask Diana what made her open up and be happier. It'd certainly be a much easier conversation than asking her about her crush.

Still, holding hands with Diana, getting all these silly compliments, and just having her by her side in such a deeper context...It made her head spin, for sure, but even with all the blushing and stuttering and running for her life…it was nice. She felt vaguely sick to her stomach, and more than a little lightheaded, but there was a thrill to it, an excitement. Two of her favorite things with one of her favorite persons. If only she wasn't supposed to be doing something right now. It'd be nice to go slower and just enjoy this moment as long as she could.

She found herself wishing could do these sorts of things and feel these sorts of feelings in real life with the real…

…Wait.

She felt the heat reclaiming its place in her cheeks once more. What exactly did she just think? Akko did not just realize she had a crush. Did she? No, that wasn't an admission. No, no. She was just getting worked up because a girl was holding her hand. She just needed to slow down and think a little deeper on this, and then she'd find her answer.

…

Oh _no._

* * *

 _A.N._

 _Remember when I said one of these chapters would end on a less distressing note for Akko?_

 _Clearly, it's not this one._

 _I don't know if this fluff is weird because of the situation she's in or the revelation about her influence that flew right over her head, but I did say it was bizarre. And sorry if you're disappointed with the Secrets door. I wanted to show while stuff about Akko probably is in there, the majority of it is much more personal and not at all romantic. I thought it was an important character beat that she be willing to stop out of respect and/or love for Diana._


	6. It's a Girl Blahs Girl World

Using the Inner Child's directions, Akko made her way to the center of her friend's mind. Or…crush's mind? Was that official now? Because yeah, fine, she admitted she liked Diana in that way now. But still, could she call it that? It may be sort of mutual, what with Rose being here, but then she also deliberately gave up getting an answer on whether it was _mutual_ -mutual or just regular mutual. And even if Diana _wasn't_ like, squishing down those feelings because she was embarrassed to be seen with Akko and did it just because she squished down everything because that was just the person she was, it would still be way too soon to call it mutual because Akko herself was only just admitting that all the times she thought she was the prettiest and smartest person she knew was her maybe starting to fall for her, and it was really just-

…

Using the Inner Child's directions, Akko made her way to the center of the mindscape she was currently in. The kid had claimed that the majority of the mindscape used to resemble her home as opposed to a stuffy government building or a neutral office, and true to her word, the environment had seamlessly transitioned into that of the Cavendish manor. Or at least, a replica of it. The grand foyer that made up the core of the consciousness was definitely not a room that could've existed there during Akko's visit to the real place. The architecture and general setting looked brighter and better put together, but it definitely matched the real deal, and would've looked right at home in her home. She suspected it better resembled what it looked like in its heyday, as opposed to the gloomy place it was when Daryl had been pawning everything off.

So if the center of this mind was the manor, and the center of Sucy's head was a dark and gothic nightmare room on top of a mushroom tower, Akko was sort of curious as to what her own mindscape looked like. She didn't exactly want something happening to her to necessitate that, but would it ever be possible to go in and see for herself? Probably not, but it was fun to imagine. Maybe her own mind was like a humongous circus, or an amazing continuous magic show, or a never-ending super huge party where everyone was happy. Or a fast food place.

Did she have lunch already? She should get something once she gets out of here. Get some calories back after all the sweating and blushing and whatnot.

To Akko's surprise, when they arrived at the core, Rose's hand actually slipped from her own. She stepped forward in disbelief, taking everything in. Her eyes followed all the personas freely walking around the mental Cavendish manor. Akko recognized a few of them from the courtroom audience. She definitely recognized Knowledgeable Diana, at least. She wasn't too sure what to make of the reaction, but Rose was definitely in awe.

"I…I can't believe I'm here." She breathed. She turned to Akko, her eyes shining. "This is where the most important Dianas live, the ones the Original deals with every day. They're so special, they get to live right next to her."

"So this place is a big deal?"

"It's the _biggest_ deal. We're in the domain of the most influential people in the entire psyche." Rose beamed. She spun around, twirling her dress, taking in all the sights. "One day, I'd love to get a room down here! I'll miss my roommates, but can you imagine? I'd never need clearance, never be shut in a repression room. I'd be with the Original all the time and help her make all kinds of decisions. Wouldn't that be wonderful, Akko?"

As a firm believer in following dreams and doing what makes you happy, Akko would've voiced her support and encouragement. But at the same time, considering the implications of what she was talking about, she wasn't sure what to say. To imagine Diana being so comfortable with her feelings for, so unabashed, to imagine her wearing her heart on her sleeve and being proud to think of Akko that way…

Well, it was almost unimaginable, to be honest. She was never that affectionate. She was Diana, and she was just Akko. But with all this stuff about changes the Reformation the Child talked about, where she somehow started changing into a more open person, maybe she could _keep_ changing. Akko always wanted to stay be her side and help her find her dreams. The only thing that had changed since this adventure started was the context of what that meant.

"I…I hope you get to live up here someday, too." Akko quietly admitted.

This crush may not make sense to her, and maybe it was a silly thing to hope for, but ultimately, what difference did that make? She spent a lifetime chasing impossible dreams, and she achieved quite a few. Akko liked Diana, and she wanted to see her happy. If she could bring Diana that happiness, do something to make her life better, then she was all in.

Rose giggled. "I'll be right back, okay Akko? I'm going to go ask around and see if there's there's there's there's there's there's there'sthere'sthere's any room vacancies here!"

Akko blinked. "I…what?"

Before she could ask her to explain, Rose had already run off to go bug the core personas about ways to get transferred. Akko's brows furrowed. "What was that…?"

The Child on her shoulders poked her head. "What was what?"

"How did you not hear that?" Akko asked. "She just said 'there' like ten times."

The Child shrugged plainly. "I don't know what you're talking about. She said it once."

Akko stared at her, expecting her to play it off as a joke, but the little girl was completely serious. She had definitely heard her repeat herself. Had the other one not noticed, or was there something else going on? If she went through all this crap just to find out Rose was actually some evil sickness in her head Akko just unleashed, she was going to be depressed for like, a year.

…Though, this could be Faiwu messing with her thoughts. She wondered if it said something about her that one explanation came to her first. Either way, she might be running out of time to get this done. She needed to hurry before the ghost took over, or Officers came to take Rose back, or some other horrible thing happened.

Leaving Rose behind, the two set out into the foyer. On the way back to her room, the Child on her shoulders began to point out the various personas that lived in the core, but while Akko hummed to acknowledge that she was listening, she really wasn't. Akko exchanged a smile with one wearing a toga named Altruistic Diana, but kept on walking. The kid pointed to one with a thesaurus named Diana Who Uses Bigger Words than She Needs to, but Akko knew she didn't have time to stop.

The Child tapped her on the head to get her attention. "Oh, my room is right there, by where Diana Who Loves Magic is standing." She said, pointing to a girl dressed like Sh-

Akko's jaw fell.

Shiny Chariot. She was dressed like Shiny Chariot. The piece in her head that Loved Magic was dressed as Shiny Chariot. That was 100% Shiny Chariot's costume. And that was 100% Diana wearing it.

And not only was she wearing it, she was _wearing_ it. She was just walking around the core, waving a glittering magic wand through the air. But she was walking while wearing _that_ costume. Shiny Chariot's costume. That she was wearing. She was walking away from Akko, which was both disappointing to see, and absolutely not at all. She was too busy staring to notice when the kid on her shoulders tapped her head.

"Hey." The Child said. "My room's right there. You can put me down."

"...yowza."

"Can you put me down now? I want to go back to my room."

"…believing heart is my magic…"

A sharp tug on her ponytail snapped back to reality. Remembering where she was, and the fact she had an actual kid on her shoulders, Akko's face turned completely scarlet. "O-oh! Um! Heheh! S-sorry! I was just-! Um!"

She set the Child down as quickly as she could. Fortunately, she was too young-minded to really get what had happened there. When her feet set on the ground, she gave Akko a questioning look. "Do you want to talk to Diana Who Loves Magic?"

"N-no! That's fine! I d-don't think I could really…speak…words." Akko cleared her throat, staring at the ceiling. What lovely light fixtures they had here. "I should…probably get going. The Original's here somewhere, and I _have_ to talk to her."

"Okay then." The Child said, reaching up to open the door to her room. "Bye. It was nice to meet meet meet meet meetmeetmeet you."

Akko squinted at her. "Huh?"

"I said said said saidsaidsaisaisaisaisaid it was nice to meet you." When Akko just stared at her, the Child opened the door to her room and stepped inside. "Okay then. Bye."

She closed the door behind her, evidently unaware what had just come out of her mouth. For the second time. It was like when Constanze's Stanbots glitched out, except much more unnerving. These weren't machines, they were people. Faiwu must be getting close to doing whatever it was it did. The Original was here somewhere. Akko just needed to somehow find her in this big foyer if she wanted to save her friend. But where to start…?

A hand touched her shoulder, and Akko jumped. "Don't arrest me again! I wasn't thinking of-!"

She whipped around, ready to start running, but it wasn't an Officer. It was Knowledgeable Diana, grinning widely. Akko let out a sigh of relief as the other girl began her spiel.

"Ah, you didn't introduce yourself to me properly earlier! I knew you were a mind-traveler, but I didn't know you were Akko!" She smiled wistfully to herself. "The Dream Department comes to me for trivia all the time related to you. And of course, the Original requests I keep a steady file on you as well."

"Wait a minute, you…know me?" Akko blinked, and felt her irritation flare. "You knew who I was and you _still_ let me get arrested?"

She just shook her head. "I don't know you by sight. Facial recognition is the Original's job. Oh, but I _do_ know plenty of facts!" She said, unable to contain her excitement at reciting trivia. "You are Atsuko Kagari, but you prefer to be called Akko. Your birthday is June 25, and you are currently 16 years old. You're seven centimeters shorter than us, a question that repeatedly comes up from the Dream Department, and we share several classes with you at Luna Nova Academy including, but not limited to, Magical Law, Philosophy of Witchcraft, Biology of Magical Creatures, Alchemy and Potmmth mmph hmph?"

Her words were cut off when Akko pressed a hand to her mouth. Which, yeah, kind of a jerk move, but that all she had to do to prevent herself from being arrested was just say her _name_ was really not putting her in the kindest of moods. Besides, Knowledgeable Diana knew she was a mind-traveler and _still_ watched her get dragged off. She could deal.

"Alright, I get it! Thank you." Akko said, removing her hand. She sighed. "Look, sorry. I'm not trying to be rude or anything, but I'm sorta busy. Do you need my help with something, or can I get back to…my stuff?"

"Help? Oh no, there's no need." She laughed. "I was just conversing with these other Dianas when I saw you, of course." She pointed to a bench with two personas on it. One dressed as a doctor, with a white coat and sterile plastic gloves, and the other in a simple looking tunic worn over some light chainmail.

"Oh, um. Hi." She shot a quick glance to the two. "I should probably get going, actually."

"Are you certain?" Knowledgeable Diana asked. "I would think an intrepid mind-traveler would jump jump jump jump jumjujujujujump at the chance to meet mental constructs!"

Akko shuddered. It was like watching a video skip, but in real life. She was too creeped out to offer much resistance as she was lead over to the bench. She wasn't sure if she really had the time to go meeting everyone.

In actuality, she already _knew_ these personas anyway, since these ones essentially _were_ her friend's personality. After all, the Knowledgeable one was here because Diana always strived to be smart and know what she's doing. And the only thing surprising about someone like the One Who Loves Magic being here was that she was wearing the Shiny Chariot outfit that was really-

No.

No, no.

 _Focus_ , Akko. Sometimes it was easy to forget that other people took threats to their lives more seriously. Diana wouldn't appreciate her goofing off when it came to a one to hers. And distractions (that was a good name for it) weren't helping her create a plan to stop Faiwu, when planning was never her strongest suit in the first place. It wasn't like she knew where the Original was or how to actually stop Faiwu, so maybe some good could come out of this conversation.

She gave a quick wave to the two on the bench. The Doctor stood from her seat and reached out a gloved hand. "I'm Compassionate Diana." She introduced herself as they shook.

Akko muttered the name for a moment before the realization hit her. She vaguely remembered the Cavendish family motto being something about compassion, and she knew healing spells were an area of considerable expertise for her family. That wasn't the exact same as being a doctor, but it only made sense that a healer be one of the most important traits in her mind. Another trait here that made complete sense.

She smiled to the Doctor and turned back to the bench. When she looked over to the other girl, she was polishing a gigantic broadsword. It was longer than Akko's entire body. Where in the world was she keeping it? When she caught Akko staring at her, the girl in the tunic and chainmail stopped to stare back.

"Salutations." She smiled. "I'm Diana Who Appreciates Medieval Weaponry."

…Okay, she had to admit, she didn't know that about her. There was _probably_ a story behind that, but she didn't exactly have the time. Though, now that she thought about it…a mind weapon could probably hurt a mind ghost. It was the best idea she had so far, at least.

"So!" Akko said, as innocently as possible. "If you're all about big scary weapons, any chance I could…I don't know, maybe borrow one?"

The Swordswoman narrowed her eyes. "You want me to just give you one of my weapons?"

"Please?" Akko batted her lashes. "I bet it'd be a _big_ help to me! Help a friend out?"

The Swordswoman placed her sword down in her lap, and looked over Akko head to toe with a quiet hum, apparently judging her worthiness to wield one of her mental weapons. Her piercing blue eyes gave her body the once-over, as they lingered on her arms, her legs, her hips, her waist and-

Wait, was she…checking her out?

The Swordswoman finished her assessment, nodding her head with a pleased smile. "I suppose I can lend you something." She arched a brow. "You seem like the type of girl who would look quite fetching with a weapon in her hands."

"…thank you?" So she passed. She wasn't sure what to think of that.

From out of nowhere, she produced a long bronze spear, with an axe blade affixed to the top. Akko gladly took it. She didn't get the story behind this persona, in any way, but after spending all day running for her life, she couldn't deny wielding a giant axe in her hands felt really, _really_ good.

Akko giggled darkly to herself. "Oooh yeah. Let's see how that ghost deals with this new big axe."

"It's a 16th century halberd." The Swordswoman and Knowledgeable Diana said at the same time. The Swordswoman shot out an icy glare, and the other persona raised her hands in surrender.

The Doctor suddenly inserted herself right into Akko's personal space. "Hold on for a second, miss."

She gently grabbed Akko's hands and shifted her grip the staff, placing them, apparently, in a better positions. "You should hold that more like this. Much better for the wrists."

"Okay then, thank-" To Akko's discomfort, the Doctor then reached over to inspect her eye, stretching her eyelid down with a gloved finger. "…Um."

"Hmm." The Doctor tutted. "Your eyes are pretty bloodshot around the edges. Have you been getting enough sleep? I would not recommend any fighting until you get some rest."

"I…think I'm asleep right now? Technically?"

"Hmm." She thankfully let go of her eyelid, only to then reach over and clinically pinch her cheek. "Perhaps drink something as well. Your skin is very flushed."

"Yah, ish been a weally wong day." Akko said. "…Pwease wet go ob my sheek."

Dutifully she let go, and Akko stepped back, massaging her warming face. Diana wasn't even a medical doctor, she used _magic_ to heal people. Way, _way_ too touchy in here. Akko was really starting to miss the reserved girl she knew and maybe mutually liked. She wanted her to be more open, but she'd rather work up to that point, thank you very much.

"Okay look, it's real nice to meet all of you. I mean, technically I've sorta met most of you before since Diana and I are s-sorta-" Akko shook her head. Words weren't usually this hard. "The _point_ is, I need to find the Original! I don't know where to go, and I don't have much time! Can you help me?"

The Doctor just blinked at her. "Oh, the Original lives right there."

She pointed her thumb to the foyer's centerpiece; a massive, stone staircase that led so high upwards Akko couldn't see the top from the ground floor. The bronze banisters glittered in the light, and a fine red carpet was draped down all the way from the top to the bottom step that sat in almost the exact center of the room. It was opulent and eye-catching in its grandness, and in hindsight, it was…pretty obvious.

"…Makes sense." Akko muttered.

"Yes." The Doctor said. "If you're looking for her, I'd recommend you go and and and and andandanaaaannnn-"

The ground suddenly shook beneath Akko's feet. She just barely managed to catch herself before she fell to the ground. Faiwu's ethereal rang out through the air, once again freezing the world around her. All the personas mingling about the foyer were petrified in place. The Doctor's mouth hung open mid-explanation. Akko huffed, listening to the angry sound.

It was surprisingly short, compared to the last two times it happened. When it ended, she looked to the Doctor, expecting her to continue her sentence blissfully unaware anything had happened.

But then…she didn't move. Not a single muscle.

Akko glanced to the other personas, expecting at least one of them to continue. But they all remained frozen. The sound had definitely stopped, and the mindscape was deathly silent. But it _should've_ been refilled with the light conversations and the sounds of all the core emotions going about their business. Akko tried to shake Knowledgeable Diana, but she couldn't get her to budge an inch. She couldn't even dent the wrinkles in her clothes. It was like pushing against a stone statue.

Akko desperately looked to the staircase. If the wailing had stopped but somehow everyone had remained frozen, then that could only mean the worst case-scenario was coming fast. She _had_ to get to the Original before the ghost took control of her. For as little as she knew about how to actually protect her from this thing, she knew even less how to get rid of it if the spirit had already taken her.

Securing her grip on the halberd, Akko bolted up the stairs, as fast as her legs could take her. The sound of her footsteps pattering against the stone steps echoed forebodingly throughout the silent foyer. She tried not to think deeply on the implications of the quiet, tried not to consider whether or not she was already too late. Her only emotion as she raced up the steps was a fierce determination that demanded she not fail.

There at the top of the massive staircase was the domain of the true core of the entire mind, the Original Diana. Her chamber was sealed off by a pair of giant doors, with symbols of the Cavendish household and history carved into the thick wood. The doors were shut securely, and a small plaque was fixed to the door that simply read, " _Do Not Disturb_ ".

The plaque fell to the ground as Akko's halberd smashed through the wood and hacked the door to pieces.

She charged into the room before the dust from the destroyed door even had time to settle, and ready to start swinging, only to skid to a halt. The innermost sanctum of the mind was…shockingly domestic. It looked like an adult's bedroom, one that could've been part of the Cavendish manor. Even more than the idealized foyer outside. It was a little darker and rougher around the edges, but it looked more real, perhaps because of it. At the end of the room was a king's sized bed with light, silk sheets. It definitely seemed like this was a replica of real bedroom. Perhaps it was her parents? She wasn't sure what that would mean.

But Faiwu…wasn't here. She also didn't exactly know what Faiwu _looked_ like, but whatever its appearance was, there wasn't anything that was out of place prowling around. Akko's eyes danced around the room for something that resembled what she thought a ghost looked like, but found nothing, leaving her holding a bronze halberd over her head with nothing to swing at. The only other occupant of the room was the Original, who gave no reaction to her presence.

The Original was standing silently with her back to Akko. One hand tapping her chin, the other crossed over her elbow. It was a dignified pose, one the real girl frequently took when she had something on her mind. In fact, out of every persona in this place, even from the back she appeared to be the truest version of her friend. She looked exactly as she did in the real world when she had let her and Sucy into the Archives. The same school uniform, the same colors, the same hairstyle, every detail as it was when she had sent Akko in here.

But…she had been asleep when she had sent Akko in here. The Original was supposed to be her conscious thought and therefore reflect the real world the most. And in the real world, they knocked her out. So, then shouldn't the Original be asleep now?

"Diana…? Is that you?" Akko called out.

The girl's head shifted. She didn't turn, but she clearly heard her. The Original seemed to consider her question, and then gave a quiet, subdued, chuckle. It certainly sounded more like how the real girl laughed, especially compared to the really colorful persona she left back in the first repression room. But it still sounded a little odd. When she finally turned around to face her, Akko gasped.

Her face looked the same, but her eyes…

Her pupils were gone. And instead of blue, her eyes were a piercing green that glowed in the darkness. A victorious smirk was pulled across her face.

"Greetings, Atsuko." Faiwu said.

As Akko's face fell, the smirk on the face Faiwu was stealing just grew and grew. "You're a troublesome fool, but not troublesome enough to best me." Faiwu smiled. "Despite your efforts, I fear it's only a matter of time until I gain full control of this mind. Your quest is at an end, and it was not short enough."

The way she spoke sent a chill down Akko's spine. It was Diana's voice, yes, but it also…wasn't. It had none of her subtle inflections, none of her nuances, and even the accent, while still English, lacked the refinement and gentleness that even the more bombastic Dianas in this mindscape had. It was so close, yet it differed in so many little things to make it incredibly unnerving. It was just…wrong.

"W-why are you doing this?" Akko glared. "What do you even _want_ with her in the first place?"

"I have no particular attachment to this girl, beyond as a means to an end." Faiwu shrugged. "I was unable to change the hearts and minds of the world in life, so I must do so in death. Once I am rid of you, I can gain my revenge."

"Revenge?"

"I refused to move on without retribution." Faiwu said, the anger just masked in its voice. "For all the bigotry I was made to endure, for the evilness of my execution. The people, their fathers and priests, they saw me as a deviant in the face of their Gods. But upon my return, I wondered if their minds would stay the same if their daughters acted as I did in life."

"What does that have to do with her?" Akko began trying to circle around the creature. Not to be outdone, Faiwu began to pace as well, maintaining the same distance as the two stepped around the room in a large oval.

"I need a body for my goal, and my goal is simple and just. I will _force_ their hearts to change. I will do so in such a way the public cannot ignore. I shall take the minds of young maidens and recruit them to my cause."

Akko remembered how nervous Diana had seemed when she first found out she was being possessed. Subdued as it was, it was there. Anything that made the real girl nervous, when she literally bottled up her feelings the way she so clearly did, made Akko nervous. Her mind could only race to imagine what horrible revenge Faiwu wanted to use her for. What dark purpose could it want that was so cruel, so horrible, to inspire such a-

"And I will use them to kiss as many maidens as possible, until the world is forced to accept my love for what I know it to be!"

…

"You're gonna what?"

* * *

 _A.N. Nonono, see? Faiwu. You switch the consonants around and it-_

 _Look, I said_ right _from the_ start _this was dumb._

 _You know, I had at least one commenter notice the anagram. I haven't totally been responding to reviews, because at some point I kinda became shy about that, but I definitely do read and appreciate them, so sorry if it ever felt like I was ignoring your questions. Along with just having fun doing it, I like writing fanfics to try and improve my writing whenever I can, so I definitely do appreciate honest feedback. I like to try and give you guys the best stories I can._

 _And on that note, sorry for missing my self-imposed update schedule. Had a midterm. Probably failed. It's done now though._


	7. A Just Cause (Just Because)

Just…once.

Just _once_ today, she'd like to have some expectations for what she was going into, and have them not be blown up in her face. Was that so much to ask? To be able be right about something? Because this entire time so far she's just been reacting to whatever gut punches life threw at her, and it had thrown some doozies as of late. What was it about today that everything kept circling back to either dying or doing gay things? Surely there were other states of being.

But today seemed to be only those two, and the proof of both of those stood in front of her, as a long dead ghost had taken over the Original Diana, and intended to do the same to the _real_ Diana. Faiwu was a spitting image of the real deal, almost more than any of the personas she met. The only differences being the luminescent green eyes, glowing eerily in the darkened air, and the smug and unabashed demeanor that it used to look down upon the stunned mind-traveler, like its victory was already assured. Without uncrossing its arms, it prowled across the mental bedroom, never breaking its confident gaze from Akko.

"It's simple." Faiwu smiled. "Once I am rid of you, I'll be able to take this mind completely. And once I take the mind, the body will become mine, and I can resume my purpose, and kiss as many girls as I can."

"What?"

"Diana Cavendish will simply be set aside for a while, whilst I borrow her form. But I'm sure with a form as lovely as this, it will be easy to fulfill my purpose. Once I'm back amongst the living once more, I'll find dozens of maidens to freely share my love's kisses with."

" _What?_ "

Faiwu just chuckled. The way it haughtily arched its brow, like she was an idiot for not understanding her crazy plan, made Akko growl. Even at her most prideful, Diana had never been so arrogant and antagonistic. And even if she was, she had never taken such a dismissive attitude towards Akko in months. This thing was defiling her, disrespecting everything that made Diana who she was, and now it had the nerve to dismiss her like this.

"Why did you even take Diana's mind anyway?" Akko made no effort to mask the anger in her voice. " _I'm_ the one you told to set you free."

Faiwu shrugged, unaffected. "That is true, but this young maiden's mind was ripe for the taking." It explained. "You seemed like an easy target, but when I peered into Diana's mind, I saw so much more...stress. Her mind was just so strained, so overworked. So much going on at once. I knew it was the better choice."

"Wait, seriously? You took her over because she was stressed out?"

"Of course." It grinned, baring its teeth. "All the strain on the mind weakens the defenses, and attacking the core becomes a simplistic task. You were agitated, but Diana already had so much agitation capped and just awaiting release. And when she thought that I would possess you, her thoughts fell into disarray, and made it that much easier."

Okay so, cool. She had been worried about her and that helped crazy evil ghost lady person take over that much faster. That made her even better about being too late to get here and stop this before it got to this point. But this point was as far as it went. Close as it was, Faiwu hadn't won yet. "You can't do this to her. You gotta stop all this possession nonsense. Just leave her brain alone."

"Your fear is well founded, but hasty." Faiwu shook its head. "I would've taken this mind already had it not been for her reaching out and focusing on your voice. It truly vexes me."

Akko thought back to the courtroom, when everyone had suddenly become calm after she had called out. And not only did that help her out back there, but it had apparently helped Diana too. "So she _did_ hear me before!" She beamed. "But I _told_ her to listen to me. Why's that so confusing to you?"

"Because most of those I've controlled always put all their energy into fighting me off, unaware that all that stress makes it easier. Diana was smart, to force herself into sleep. It lulls the mind into a sense of comfort and safety, slowing me down considerably. I can work through it, given time, but your call to her illuminated something that's become a greater obstacle. Even now, when I am all but controlling the core of this mind, it focus on _you_."

"…Me?"

The spirit nodded wearily, pacing in thought. "Your very presence creates conflict in this mind. Even when she was awake, I saw the strain on her mind from just being around you. So many conflicting and complicated emotions running rampant. And yet…"

It stopped suddenly, and leaned in close to study Akko's face. She couldn't help but lean back as the spirit explained. "Yet despite how much conflict you create here, at her core she finds that same feeling of safety, but centered on you. For all her outwards friction, in the depths of her thoughts she seems to view you as a constant force, something she finds some security in and relies upon. It's a peculiar contradiction. What do you make of it, I wonder?"

The same feeling centered on…her? Akko wasn't sure what to make of it at all. Diana was always working so hard, and she controlled herself so tightly. And yet…for as guarded as she was around everyone, she never acted that way around her. Diana never saw reason to, and she assumed it was because she had earned her trust.

But that she felt so comfortable around her in the depths of her heart…something comparable to an all-encompassing warmth and security that rest brought, the idea of just being totally peaceful and relaxed and unguarded…If Diana felt that way around her, that could only mean one thing…couldn't it?

Akko looked up. "She…thinks I'm boring?"

Faiwu looked distinctly unimpressed. "…You're not a very intelligent person, Atsuko." It rolled its eyes with a resigned sigh. "I suppose I'm not entirely sure what it means myself, but for as much as this feeling impedes me, it's only a matter of time before it falters and I conquer this mind completely."

Akko's grip tightened on her halberd. "No, it's _not._ " She glared. "You're not taking over Diana's mind as long as I'm still in here, so you can just forget it."

Faiwu spared a single glance to the weapon before the confidence returned to its features. "You can't hurt me with that weapon, you know. Not without harming your ally."

She...hadn't actually thought of that. Somewhat dejectedly, she lowered the halberd. "…Why are you so set on kissing people? It's not…a _bad_ goal? I guess? But…you know, why?"

She could see it debating whether or not to tell her. It tapped its chin a few times, before giving a quick shrug. "You see, when I was only your age, I fell in love with a young woman. She was so fair, so gentle and kind. A true beauty. But the rest of the town didn't see it as such. They told me I was sick in the head for falling in with another woman. I knew my feelings were true, but they wouldn't listen. They told me I was wrong. The girl believed them, it seemed, as I never saw her again. But I knew I had to prove to those naysayers how true my love was. So I did the most logical thing."

It smiled proudly and triumphantly. "I ran through town, and kissed as many women as I could. I kissed maidens, I kissed wives, I kissed the homeless, and I kissed the noble. I even kissed the crown princess of a foreign country that was visiting that day. That day was a glorious day for love, one that should be remembered for all history."

"You...you just…went up and kissed a princess?"

Faiwu sighed wistfully. "She was lovely, that one. But of course, her guards seemed to think something was wrong with me, bigoted fools that they were." Anger flashed on its face. "I was cruelly executed, long before my time. My soul refused to move on. I refused to die, just because they thought it wrong for a woman to love another. So my spirit returned, to possess the fairer sex. And I shall kiss a _thousand_ maidens, until the world is forced to accept my love!"

And then Faiwu laughed, the kind of maniacal laugh that seemed very practiced and theatrical, where it wrung its hands in the air and threw its head back. It was very dramatic, but despite that, Akko was left more confused than anything.

As Faiwu briefly paused and took in a breath to begin laughing anew, Akko interjected. "But there's nothing wrong with girls liking girls now."

Faiwu stopped completely, and turned to look at her. It blinked once. Then twice. Then it spoke. "…I beg your pardon?"

"I mean, yeah." Akko shrugged. "Same with guys and guys, you know? None of that's illegal anymore. Most people are pretty cool with that kind of thing by now. Heck, there's a lot of girls at my school that are pretty open about that."

"What?"

"Sure, I hear people flirting in the stairwells sometimes. Most people I know are pretty much fine with girls getting together and dating and all that. I mean, girls can even get married in a lot of countries now! Tons of places have marriage equality. They even have parades about that sorta thing."

" _What?_ "

She couldn't help but sympathize. She wasn't on-board with just smooching people on the street, but clearly the poor soul was born in the wrong century. "Listen, your dream is weird and sorta creepy, but I think I get why you did it, and you got what you wanted! Maybe you even helped changed people's minds somehow! But the point is, you don't need to keep doing this. You don't need Diana, because the world already _did_ accept your love!"

There was a measure of doubt on its stolen face. "You claim everything just…changed like that." It said flatly. "That my dream was finished while I was sealed away."

"Yeah. Which kinda sucks, I get it." Akko gave a sad smile. "I'd be disappointed if I didn't get to see the stuff I want happen, but that doesn't mean it didn't happen. I'm sorry you missed it, and it's a pretty bad deal you got killed over it, but it's done now! The world's a better place, and your dream came true, so you don't need to be angry anymore!"

She held out her hand as a peace-offering. Faiwu's brows furrowed at her outstretched palm, before its eyes flicked back to the girl speaking to her with a soft tone.

"You can be happy now, and you don't have to haunt people or possess people anymore." Akko said. "You can just move on."

With a sharp gasp, Faiwu's eyes searched Akko's face, as if looking for the truth in her words. She, in turn, just smiled genuinely and brightly, to assure the spirit it could leave this world with its heart finally at peace. Its green eyes widened in realization. She could see the way it weighed her words, and considered the implications. After a moment, it looked back up and gave Akko a gentle smile. She found herself thinking how the friendly expression looked so much more fitting on Diana's face. With a soft sigh, it walked over and placed its hand on the shorter girl's shoulder.

"…No."

Faiwu suddenly shoved her to the floor and ripped the halberd from her hand. With an angry growl, it raised the weapon high over its head, and swung down. Akko yelped, and rolled out of the way just in time to see the wooden floor splinter right where her neck had been. Before she could even exclaim in shock, the spirit ripped the blade from the floor, and swung savagely at her. Akko scrambled to her feet, just barely managing to avoid the blows. Was it trying to kill her now? Why was it trying to kill her? Why did _everything_ try to kill her?

"Whoa whoa _whoa!_ " Akko raised her hands in surrender. "W-what did I do wrong this time?!"

"Do you think me a fool?" Faiwu growled. "Do you think I would be deceived by your trickery? Why would I believe you?"

"T-trick?! Wait, I'm not-!" She jumped as the halberd's blade screamed towards her legs, missing by scant inches. She had no idea what would happen in the real world should her consciousness be hurt, but with her luck, she wasn't gambling. "C'mon! J-just hear me out!"

The blows didn't falter, and Akko found herself being driven into a corner. She tried to control her panic. She needed to think of something to stop this thing, or Diana was going to be in real trouble. And also, clearly not big on using its words. This place was a bedroom, and there weren't any good weapons to fight back with, but she grabbed the first thing she could reach and threw it as hard as she could. The silk pillow bounced uselessly off Faiwu's chest.

It just smirked at her counter attack. "I refuse to move on without finishing what I've started." Faiwu threatened. "It's been _years_ since I last left that accursed vessel! Thrice now I've been sealed, I won't go back a fourth time!"

"Just put down the stupid axe! I'm telling you the _truth_ , you crazy-!" Faiwu had little interest in what it perceived as an attempt to trick it back into its prison. It raised the halberd high over its head and mercilessly swung down.

Akko quickly grabbed the weapon's staff in midair and stopped it before the blow was dealt. She pushed it back upwards with all her strength. With her back to the wall, almost literally, she had no choice but to win. She yanked it forward, catching Faiwu off-balance. It attempted to wrench the weapon from her grasp, but to no avail, locking the two in a deadly game of tug-of-war.

Her heart skipped a beat when she felt her grip faltering, but when she looked up, she gasped. Cracks were spreading all across the bronzed surface of the mental weapon. The halberd began to disintegrate into nothingness in their grasp. Dust rained down from their empty hands that was gone before it hit the floor. But if something had happened that made it impossible for the weapon to maintain its form, then that could only mean…

Faiwu looked up in confusion, before it reached the same realization as her, and a wide grin spread across its stolen features. "Your lies accomplished but one thing, Atsuko. It brought me enough time to take complete control."

Faiwu gleefully laughed, turning its back to Akko without a care. It had won. She was too late to stop it. The ground rumbled. The walls cracked. Pillars jutted out from the floor, and stabbed into the ceiling. All the fancy furniture in the room lifted from the floor and were crushed into pieces. From under their feet, the colors of the room began to bleed out, fading to a dead, lifeless gray.

Another quake of the ground stole Akko's footing and sent her falling. She looked on in horror as the world around her began to bend to the creature's will. This was the worst case-scenario unfolding before her eyes. She couldn't let this happen. She couldn't let Diana down, not when she needed her most. Maybe she could fix this once she regained control of her mind, but first she had to get this thing out.

"I wouldn't fret, Atsuko." Faiwu said, watching her distress with a clear amusement. "I'm sure I'll return it someday. But for now, this body is _mine_."

"N-no…" Akko growled. "No it's _not!_ "

She darted to her feet and charged at the spirit. But the closer she got, the more she felt a force pushing her back, like an impossible wind. Her feet dragged across the floor. For every step she took, she would be pushed back another two. She reached out, hoping to grab onto _something_ to pull her forward and stop this. But the force just grew stronger, lifting her from her feet and pushing her outwards. Faiwu just crossed its arms and laughed.

Before Akko knew it, her consciousness was flung from the core. She awoke with a start, feeling like her brain had just been slammed back into her skull. She opened her eyes, trying to reorient herself as quickly as she could. She had been banished from the mind. She was back in the Archives. Back in the real world.

"Oh no…" Akko ran her hands through her hair. "No no no…"

If she was back in the real world, then Faiwu was still in there, and now there was no one to stop it. She looked to the real Diana on the stone floor. She was still asleep, and her face still strained with effort, but her features were twitching as Faiwu gradually took control unopposed. Once the sleeping spell wore off, she wasn't sure if there would be anything she could do. Time was quickly falling through her fingers.

Sucy was sitting on Diana's stomach, casually reading the bestiary. Akko grabbed her by the arms and shook her. "Sucy! It's bad! We gotta- wait why are you sitting on her?"

Sucy just shrugged, not looking up from her book. She flipped to the next page as she spoke. "She did say not to let her leave, and I didn't want to read on the floor."

"Oh. Alrighty. Anyway." Akko cleared her throat. " _Sucy!_ It's bad! Faiwu kicked me out! We gotta stop Diana before she wa-!"

But before she could finish her explanation, the girl beneath her roommate suddenly began pushing herself upwards. With her seat shifting, Sucy snapped her book shut and stood. It was hard to tell if she was unaware of what happened or if she just wasn't taking it seriously, but either way Akko let loose a frustrated growl at her. Diana, _Faiwu_ , climbed to its feet unimpeded. Its eyes opened with a dark green glow.

"Ah…yes. Finally." Faiwu stretched out its new limbs, chuckling to itself. "After 150 years, I have returned to the world of the living. I'm free from that accursed vessel at last. Oh, how _good_ it feels to be free once more." It clenched its fists, relishing the sensation of the touch of fingers on its palms. A chill ran down Akko's spine at the victorious smirk spreading across Diana's face.

"…Oh." Sucy droned. She turned to her roommate. "So that's what you were trying to say before. You should speak faster next time."

Couldn't just _one_ thing go right today? Not only did Faiwu take over the mind before she could stop it, but it had full control of the body as well. And now it was awake and loose in the real world. It was almost overwhelming how quickly everything fell apart. She was running out of chances, and a part of her began to doubt if she really could save her friend after all, but she tried to push the doubts from her head. There _had_ to still be a way to fix this. She knew there had to be.

Faiwu's green eyes narrowed when they set upon Akko, but quickly flicked over to the other witch in the room. Its eyes danced over Sucy's form, before it sauntered over to her with its hands on its hips. Before Sucy could say a thing, Faiwu had pinned her to the wall, with a distinctive waggle of its eyebrows.

Faiwu spoke in a singsong voice. "Ah… _hello_ there, Sucy. How different you look in person. What a lovely, pale complexion you have." It reached over, twirling her hair in its fingers. "And such long hair! I've always found that women looked better with it."

Sucy blinked at the girl leering over her, and then turned her head. "Hey. Akko." She called out. "What the hell is this?"

Faiwu giggled. "Such a mouth! Perhaps I should find a way to…" It cradled her chin and leaned forward towards her lips. "…occupy it…"

Wait a minute, why was it going to Sucy first? Sucy didn't even _like_ Diana like that. Akko wasn't even sure Sucy liked her that much at all. She wouldn't even appreciate the affection. And all the mental Dianas had flirted with _her_ , so what sense did it make that Faiwu would go waltz over to Sucy and-

 _Wait a minute_ , what kind of thought was that? This was absolutely _not_ important right now. Diana wouldn't want her body running around kissing _anyone_. Akko shook the thoughts from her head. She had to stop this before it went too far. She suddenly remembered the sleeping spell they had used on the girl back when this all started. If she could knock her out again, she and Sucy could figure out a way to reclaim Diana's mind.

Akko struggled to remove the wand clipped to her belt. Once it was free, she flicked it through the air and poured all of her will into the spell. Magic balled in the tip of her wand, aimed right at the back of Faiwu's head, and she released with a quick shout of " _Obdormiscere!_ " A blue beam shot out through the air, screaming towards its target. And then three things happened in the space of about a second.

Akko felt quite smart for remembering the correct incantation.

Faiwu heard her fumbling with her wand and ducked out of the way.

Sucy was promptly hit in the face with a sleeping spell.

The two remaining girls watched as Sucy fell face-forward and hit the ground with a thump. With her face pressed firmly against the bricks, she began to loudly snore. Akko's mouth hung open, and Faiwu looked vaguely disappointed. That...had seemed significantly more triumphant in her head. She was definitely going to be hearing about _this_ one for a while. She hesitantly raised her wand to try again, only to have it snatched from her hand.

"Wh-! Hey!" Faiwu observed her wand for a moment, before chucking it to the other side of the room. Akko groaned. She was getting real sick and tired of this ghost's nasty habit of stealing things she liked.

"I suppose I must seek my kisses elsewhere." Faiwu spun on its heels. "I'm sure I can find many lovely maidens out there."

Akko's eyes snapped up as Faiwu started towards the door. If that thing was set loose in Luna Nova, it would go after girls left and right. There was a reason Diana emphasized not letting her leave the room until it was purged. If the school's most well-mannered and respected student ran wild kissing people at random, it would ruin her. Diana would never live it down. She charged at Faiwu's back and wrapped her arms around its midsection. The height difference made it awkward, but she lifted it from its feet, trapping it in place. It struggled in her arms, and sweat beaded on her forehead.

"Y-you're not going _anywhere_ …!" Akko strained as she carried the creature away from the door. "Until you…let her go!"

A huff escaped Faiwu's lips. "Look Atsuko, I have no desire to kiss you, so please release me."

The blood rushed to her face. "W-what?!" She stammered. "N-no! I'm not trying to-! T-that's not what-"

Before she could manage an explanation, a hand covered her face. Faiwu pushed off, freeing itself from her grasp and sending her doubling over. At the mercy of gravity yet again, Akko rolled with the hit, and somersaulted herself back on her feet by the time her head would've hit the ground. Did she _really_ just let herself be played like that? And it's not like she could ever hit back in good conscience, so this entire thing was unfair. Stupid beautiful ghost.

Faiwu pulled open the door, giddy with the thoughts of what kisses it might gain beyond the threshold, only to have the exit slammed shut in its face as Akko charged her shoulder into the wood. It groaned in frustration. " _You_ …are wearing out my patience."

"Yeah, well, get used to it." Akko challenged. "I'm not going anywhere until you let her go. You can't just run around kissing everyone in other people's bodies!"

"And why is that?" Faiwu crossed its arms. "It's for a noble purpose. There are girls out there who must be kissed, and I am the one to do it."

"Because that, that right there, is really creepy!"

"Creepy…?" It bristled. "It's called _love_. What better expression of love is there than a surprise kiss?"

Akko sputtered, trying to articulate a coherent counterargument. "That's...it's not….it's really…" She tapped her chin. "…Listen, I'm pretty sure you're wrong, but I can't figure out how to make it words."

Faiwu let out a long sigh. "It's a shame, really. Perhaps it's just the lingering feelings of comfort this mind had for you, but I do admit, you're quite fair. Despite that, however, you have been hounding me this entire time, and it's clear you don't understand how love works."

It made a sudden grab for the doorknob, only to have its hand slapped away. If she failed in everything else today, she _will_ succeed here, even if just by the skin of her teeth. It attempted to push her aside, but her feet were planted firmly. And increasingly, she could see it struggling to contain its fury.

"You irritating little…!" It made another grab for the knob, and received another literal slap on the wrist. "What is it going to take with you to move?!"

"You can't take Diana!" Akko glared. "I'm not gonna let you mess with _any_ of my friends, but especially not her! I know she wouldn't want this! If you started running around kissing people in her body, it'd ruin her reputation."

"Is that truly what's important to you?" It sneered. "That she maintain her precious image?"

"No! I don't honestly get it at all!" Akko threw up her hands. "I think it's ridiculous what she does! All this work she does to be the perfect student and witch and whatever is way too much for one person. And on top of all that she actually repressed her desire for _sleep_. Did you notice that in there? Who does that?!"

"Then why-?"

"Because it's important to her!" Akko argued. "And that makes it important to me! If it makes her happy, then I'm going to support her! Because I love her and _that's_ what you do when you love someone!"

Faiwu gaped at her, its brows raised high. It looked completely shocked, like she had just said something unbelievable. Honestly, she felt like she's been repeating herself quite a bit here today, so she was pretty sure she didn't say anything weird, did she? Akko cocked her head. "…What? Why are you looking at me?"

"You…you would admit such a thing so brazenly…?"

"Admit wha-?" Her brain caught up with her once more, and she belatedly realized just what it was she said. The heat flared to her cheeks. "W-wait wait wait! Hold on! I…I didn't mean-! I mean, I didn't _not_ mean, b-but that's not…w-well…okay so...uh…!"

"You would try to take your statement back?" Faiwu glowered. "But you've said there's no shame in such a thing any longer. Do you admit you were deceiving me?"

She frantically waved her hands. "N-no, I wasn't lying! That sorta thing _is_ cool now, b-but it's just that-!" She groaned at herself. Even her embarrassment was embarrassing her. "I…I didn't even know I liked her like that until like twenty minutes ago, okay?! I've never even said it out loud before!"

"I'm sure." It scoffed. "Enough of this. I don't have time for all this ridiculous stuttering. I have things to do."

Akko pinched the bridge of her nose, trying to fight down her blush. "Look, it's been a really weird day for me, and I'm still wigging out here. Diana's way too important to me to just give up. I…didn't really…mean to _say_ that before, b-but I was telling the…truth." She cleared her throat. "So I can't let you go, because that would let her down."

It was a slight thing, barely visible behind its angry expression, but Faiwu's gaze seemed to soften. "…You truly value her that much, do you?"

"I don't get why you don't believe about the rest of the stuff, but you gotta believe me when I say I care about Diana." Akko sighed, scratching the side of her head. "She's…probably the smartest, and the prettiest, and the most talented person I know. A-and she doesn't always show it, but she's so nice under all that. She's just…really great. We didn't… _always_ get along, but she's probably my best friend now. And when she opens up to me, and says that she actually trusts me to be there for her, it…it just makes me so… _happy_ , you know? "

As she spoke, her gaze gradually fell. Her mind made a point to think of the person in front of her, the person she was pouring her heart out to, as only Faiwu. Despite the body it had stolen, it was just a formless spirit of a girl from a time long past. But even still, admitting this out loud at all sent her nerves jittering throughout her body. Every time Faiwu blinked, her heart skipped a beat at the thought those eyes would return to their familiar blue.

"I like being around her." She admitted. "I like the way she smiles, and how she's always out there helping people learn about magic in her own way. I like that she's always trying to do her best, and the way she always uses these big fancy words. I even like the way she has trouble showing the way she cares about me and all of her friends, even though I know she really does under all of that. I like all those little things about her, because that's _her_. And I…w-well, I…" She swallowed, and let the words escape her.

"I do…love her."

Even just staring at her own two feet, she felt like her stomach was being churned inside out. She hadn't intended to confess nearly that much, but all her feelings seemed to just spill out as soon as she opened her mouth. Her cheeks were a bright, brilliant red, and she could feel the heat all the way up to her ears. She all but had to force herself to look up at the creature with Diana's face. Faiwu...looked almost moved by the sentiment. Like it desperately wanted to believe her.

"Is that truly…?" But its face quickly hardened, narrowing its eyes once more. "No. No, this…this is another trick of yours, to seal me away again. I can't believe this. I don't believe anything has changed the way you claim."

"Are you kidding me?!" Oh, if it didn't have such a pretty face, Akko would absolutely throttle this spirit into the afterlife. "C-can I just get a _break_ today?! Why is this so hard to believe? You were stuck in your jar for over a hundred years! Of _course_ things changed!"

"Because the first time I was sealed, it was for _two_ hundred. And when I was released, nothing changed. And then for another seventy-five, I was trapped alone in the dark, and again nothing. Why _should_ I believe you? This all sounds very…convenient for me. I'm just to accept that the world changed so much, and my noble cause was completed without me to witness it?"

"L-look, I don't even _want_ to seal you again. I don't even know _how._ I just want Diana back, because…" She averted her gaze. "B-because I _like_ her like that, and I don't want you to do something to her that's gonna hurt her."

Faiwu crossed its arms. "And I must take this all on word of mouth? From you?"

For someone obsessed with kissing, it sure didn't seem to get love all that much. Not that Akko really did either. She was only just figuring out how she felt now, but she believed in her heart when it told her how she felt about Diana. And now, when she felt like she really had something to talk about, Diana went ahead and got taken over by some crazy spirit. There was really only one way she could do this, wasn't there?

She blew up her bangs, before once again meeting the unimpressed gaze of the spirit possessing her best friend. She needed to get through to Diana, and she needed to convince Faiwu to believe her when she said she loved her. And clearly the thing went stir-crazy, and only understood one language. She took a deep breath, did as much as she could to quiet her frantic thoughts, and shot out a preemptive apology.

"SorryDianadoingthisbecauseIcare."

Akko kicked the spirit's legs out from under it. Faiwu fell towards the stone floor, but before the impact came, found itself caught and sinking into her grip. Akko had an arm hooked around its waist, and the other around the back of its head. Faiwu, _Diana_ , was thoroughly swept off her feet, supported only by the girl stooping over her. Wide green eyes stared up at her determined face.

"Wh-?" Faiwu sputtered, clearly uncomfortable with someone cradling her like this. "A-Atsuko? What are you…?"

"T-this isn't for you, by the way." Akko pinched her eyes shut. "This is for Diana."

She squeezed the other girl's hip, and with her other hand running through her blonde hair to the small of her back, pulled her head upwards. She quickly bent downward to meet her, and with all the passion in her heart, mashed her lips right onto Diana's.

And wasn't it _just_ her luck that her first kiss would be taken by expelling an ancient and vengeful phantom with an aggressive appetite for public displays of affection from the body of the girl she fell in love with?

* * *

 _A.N. One last cliffhanger before the story's over! We might actually get to see Diana in-character for a change! Plus, we gotta see what happens with our debatably threatening antagonist on the receiving end of its own medicine._

 _You know, I didn't even think how close this was to Halloween. It's funny how that worked out._

 _…And also, you know, hope Sucy's alright._


	8. The World's Least Witting Seduction

The sentimental part of her wished her first kiss would've been more meaningful, in some big climatic way. But then, she supposed it already kind of was. What could have more meaning to her than doing everything she could to save Diana? And saving someone with a kiss was a pretty heroic ending, in a fairy tale kinda way. Besides that, she was actually kissing Diana, in real life, right now. That was way too exciting and thrilling to pass up. So she couldn't honestly say she regretted it.

She pulled the other girl deeper into the embrace, sinking into her lips. The irony of Faiwu's shock was lost beneath the undeniable feeling of elation in her heart, and the surprised noise would've been unnoticeable had Akko been intimately connected to the mouth it was stealing. Its noise only lasted a second. She couldn't say how long the kiss had lasted, but she felt her throat burning and finally pulled back. Her breaths came heavy, to relieve the pressure in her lungs and the lack of it in her head. Her eyes finally cracked open, gazing down at the girl hanging in her arms.

Blue eyes were squinting back at her. Not green.

Blue.

Akko was pretty sure her heart just stopped in her chest. The rest of her muscles definitely seized. Diana was awake. And not only was she awake, she was _looking_ at her. While she was _in her arms._ This was bad. Bad bad bad. This was not a position she planned to be in. The plan had not actually considered what would happen if it worked, much less what she would say. _Now_ she was regretting it.

Diana's head tilted to the side. Her eyes were still pretty glazed over, from what little she could see behind the narrowing. Between the all the ways the possession affected her mind, not to mention the sleeping spell, it was hard to tell if she was all the way there yet. It was even more evident when she finally spoke.

"Akko…?" Her words were groggy, and ran into each other. "Is that…you?"

Swallowing, Akko managed a nervous smile. "Y-yeah. It's me, Diana." She bent down to her knee, gently lowering Diana to sit on the floor. Which had the added bonus of putting them in a much less…compromising position. "You o-okay? How are you feeling?"

The blonde girl groaned as she sat down. "My head's…fuzzy." Her eyes cast downward, finally noticing Akko's hands on her hip and shoulder. "Wait…why…are you…holding me?"

The hands were retracted in an instant. Bad. Oh this was _so_ bad. "W-well, um." Her mind raced to think of an explanation. "Heheh." She failed completely.

Diana listened to her somewhat blankly. After an agonizingly long pause, a realization seemed to settle on her. She leaned back, almost in thought. "Oh…" She said softly. "Am I…dreaming right now?"

Akko bit her lip. "…do you _feel_ like you're dreaming?" That might explain that long pause. Of course she'd be a bit delirious after all that. "Um, so listen. You're good now, alright Diana? Everything's been fixed up, and you don't need to worry or anything. Just…uh, take it easy."

"I…yes." She nodded, very slowly. "I'm just…unsure of myself right now. I…must be…dreaming. Probably will…just…forget things…"

That would certainly spare them both some embarrassment, but Akko wasn't sure if she should play along. She'd feel bad taking advantage when she wasn't in her right mind. "W-well, either way. You're safe now, Diana. You can just take as long as you need to get better, and I'll be right here to help you, okay?"

Diana gently took in air. She stared at Akko's bright and encouraging smile, somewhere between puzzled and surprised. She swallowed, before looking back up into her eyes. "Akko…come here for a second."

Akko scooted closer, figuring Diana must still be having trouble reorienting herself now that she was awake again. She was ready to help her with whatever she needed. What she was _not_ ready for was her to reach out and rest her hand on her cheek. Akko made a conscious effort not to make any noises or react funny. Diana was still in a dreamlike state, after all. She didn't need any more mental trauma. And it was then that Diana pulled her forward and kissed her.

Her squeak was muffled against Diana's lips. "mm-!"

What.

 _Whatwhatwhatwhatwhatwhat?_

The kiss lasted barely ten seconds. But there was no way Akko would've guessed. This was _so_ different than the first one. This time Diana was kissing back. She could actually feel her pressing against her lips. And even as completely bewildered as the shorter girl was (- _whatwhatwhat-_ ) there was no denying the way her chest swelled with excitement. Between all the emotions running wild, she didn't even react until Diana began to pull away.

"D-Diasha?" Akko breathed. "Diaba? Deanna? De, dah, deh…?"

She wasn't just pulling away. The girl's eyes were fluttering, and she was falling back limply. Snapped out of her daze, Akko quickly caught her shoulders. She just fainted. She actually just fainted. Her head must've been a real mess right now. That must be why she just…performed the actions that she did. Must be. Just not in her right mind as of yet. She must really need the rest to recover.

Akko took a calming breath. She could physically _feel_ her heartbeat slamming against her chest. God, she really couldn't handle any more surprises right now.

Akko gently laid her sleeping form back on the ground, brushing her hair as she set her head down. Before she had entered her mind, her face was wrinkled with effort and in pain. But now, her muscles were relaxed, and her expression was soft. Her cheeks were light and rosy, and even back asleep there was a hint of a smile on the corners of her lips.

"Okay…settle down Akko." She whispered to herself, hand clutching her chest. "That…that just happened."

"Yes." A sudden voice spoke from inside her ear. "It certainly did. How peculiar."

It was a testament to how much Diana needed the rest that the shriek didn't wake her. The voice spoke to Akko evenly, coming from seemingly nowhere. "I didn't expect her to be in so much of a stupor, but I suppose the fault is partially mine, for leaving so suddenly."

Wait. It was Faiwu's voice. Its _real_ voice, the one that had originally called to her from the jar. It had been speaking with Diana's voice so long, she had forgotten what it had sounded like. It sounded about her own age, and its accent was somewhat implacable, but she definitely recognized it. And now it was internally speaking to her again.

"Aw no…" Akko groaned. "You're not gonna try to take over _my_ head now, are you?"

She heard it chuckle. "No. It appears I have no reason to. I still doubted your intentions, so when you attempted to kiss me, I left to see how she might react. And she kissed you. And if she kissed you, then it _must_ be love."

"I…guess?" Akko shrugged, but she had no idea if Faiwu could even tell.

"Do not guess. Know." Faiwu reprimanded. "If you kiss, then it's love. That's how the world works, my young friend."

There were a couple comments on the edge of her tongue, but she wisely decided to keep them to herself. "So…you're letting her go then, right?" Akko asked hopefully. "We're not gonna keep doing this anymore, are we?"

"If it seemed to me you were lying, then I would have to return to her body to find my love's kisses once more. But…it seems you were right, young one." Its tone softened considerably. The ghost didn't truly have a form, but she could hear the smile in its voice. "Perhaps my noble purpose _has_ been fulfilled."

"I _told_ you." Akko crossed her arms, barely even thinking about how weird it was to talk to a voice inside her head. "You could've just listened to me instead of stealing my axe and my wand and my best friend."

"Ah, but surely you can relate to my cause!" There was no small amount of mirth in Faiwu's voice. "It's clear to me now you're a kindred spirit like me who enjoys the company of the fairer sex, yes?"

"Well, I mean…actually I'm bi."

There was a short pause. "Oh…Farewell to you too, then." It said dejectedly. "I assumed us to be having a heart to heart, but I can understand you want me to move on."

"No! I…" Akko sighed. She didn't have the patience for this anymore. "…Never mind. I hope you got what you needed then."

"I suppose I have. Though, before I go, Atsuko…" Faiwu seemed to pause again to consider its words. "In the future I would recommend focusing on her bottom lip."

"…For what?"

"Just in general."

She nodded slowly, awaiting more of an explanation, but she got no response. Faiwu's voice never sounded again. Which could only mean after several centuries of toiling, the Phantom of Faiwu had finally moved on. She wondered if maybe somehow, it could be reunited with the girl it once fell for. At the very least, she hoped its heart was finally at peace. Faiwu deserved its happiness. Even if it was a complete weirdo.

With silence enveloping the room once more, she pushed herself upwards. She walked past the shards of glass from the broken jar. Her wand sat on the floor in the far corner of the room, where it had been thrown in the struggle earlier. She bent down low to the floor, picked it from the ground and clipped it back to her belt. She straightened, and turned around to face the rest of the room. She let her eyes wander. Then she let her thoughts wander. And then she turned and faced the wall.

And then promptly slammed her head into it.

"OH MY GOD!" She giggled hysterically. "W-what did I just _do?!_ That just happened! I just kissed-! And then she…! Oh my god, that was nuts! That was nuts! Oo-hohoho my god, I can't believe that even _worked!_ I can't believe I just-! We just-! T-that just happened! Twice! _Twice!_ Oh my god! What was I thinking?!"

Akko hid in her palms once more, but continued her manic babbling all the same. "Ohohoho no, how much of this is she gonna _remember?!_ W-what is she gonna say? NO! What am _I_ gonna say?! She…she just woke up and-! W-will she remember that?! She thought it was a dream! D-does that mean in her dreams I-?! We-?! God I can't believe that worked! Why did that work?! What was I thinking?!"

She took a deep, deep breath. And then another, and one more for good measure. In, and out. Inhale and then exhale. "Okay. There." She breathed. "That's…that's all out of my system now. I'm good. I'm good. Settle down, Kagari. Had your freakout, now everything's done. Okay. Now…just gotta wait, let her wake up, and then we'll deal with it."

With another long, long exhale, she turned and looked back to the greater part of the Archives. Her gaze held on Diana. Her thoughts wandered once more. And once more, the words sprayed from her mouth like a madman as she faced the wall to yell incoherently.

"ダイアナは私を愛しています! 私はまだそれについて驚いています! 私はこの翻訳が正しいことを願っています！私の話を読んでくれてありがとう!"

There. _Now_ it was all out of her system.

Her verbal assault on the masonry, however, was loud enough to stir those who had been drifting in and out of consciousness. Akko turned to see Diana sitting up, resting her palm on her forehead. "Ugh…what in the world…?" She groaned under her breath. "What did I…?"

"Diana?" Akko quickly made her way to kneel next to her. "Um…you okay?"

The blonde girl furrowed her brows, studying her face for a moment. "…Oh, yes. I'm alright. Just…I seem to have a bit more of a headache than I expected. It will pass, I'm sure."

"It's…it's really you, isn't it?" Akko asked hopefully. "You're finally yourself again, right?"

Diana smiled, the same subdued smile that felt much more familiar to her face. The kind that would only come from the real her. It was funny how Akko had never _really_ left her side, but still found her heart jumping like they had finally been reunited. She reached down and helped pull the blonde girl to her feet.

"I'm myself again." Diana confirmed with an appraising look. "But, I suppose there's only one explanation for that, isn't there? You've managed to seal the Phantom away once more, correct?"

"Actually, no. I didn't. It left on its own. I…guess I convinced it to move on." Akko shrugged helplessly, figuring it wasn't a big deal. But Diana's brows shot upwards, unable to hide her disbelief.

"You…convinced an ancient spirit to move on…?" A small half-chuckle escaped Diana's lips, and she shook her head. "It seems my faith in you was well-placed, Akko. You never cease to impress."

The shorter girl smiled downward at her lap, flushing at the praise. Just as she was about to look up and play it off, a book sailed through the air and beaned her in the back of the head. She rubbed the growing bruise, and turned only to be met with a very displeased glare. Sucy snatched the thrown bestiary from the ground, and leveled Akko with a dangerous look.

"Next time," Sucy warned, her voice laced with venom. "Watch where you're aiming."

Akko raised her hands in surrender. "Oh man, I'm _so_ sorry, Sucy! It was an accident, I swear!" Her thoughts raced, trying to think of a decent excuse. "I…helped you get the bestiary, didn't I?"

Sucy grumbled at it, but accepted the excuse nonetheless. "Help she says." She glowered out the door and back towards their room, mumbling under her breath the entire time. "I'm the one who found it. You just got us into the room..."

Diana watched Sucy leave with no small amount of confusion. Which confirmed she didn't exactly remember all of Faiwu's actions. On the one hand, great, because there were one or two things Akko wasn't sure she wanted to explain. On the other, knowing your body ran around without you even aware of it couldn't be a good feeling, and Diana clearly was unhappy with the gaps in her memory. "Akko, when I was possessed…" She bit the inside of her cheek. "…Nothing… _happened_ , did it?"

"You didn't kiss anyone while you were all possessed, if that's what you're worried about." Which was, technically, true. Diana Cavendish never initiated lip contact with anyone while under Faiwu's influence. What were lies of omission but simply underachieving truths?

Diana nodded, with a forced smile on her face. And the topic of kissing seemed to lead them into the deeper topic neither of them really wanted to talk about yet. An awkward silence weighed down upon them. Diana seemed to have trouble looking her in the eye, a minor detail that went so much deeper with how proper a person she strived to be.

Akko knew now. And Diana knew that she knew. There was no way she could think Akko wouldn't have found out her repressed crush. And whatever she had planned to _do_ with those feelings, the chance had been robbed from her. Now she knew before Diana had wanted her to know. That idea was eating at the Cavendish heiress, and Akko couldn't help but feel incredibly invasive.

"Um…Diana, listen. About me going into your head…"

Still failing to meet her eyes, Diana just waved her hand. "I _said_ I trust you Akko. I am…concerned about what you might've found in my mind, but…" She sighed, hugging her arms to her chest. "That still stands."

Akko couldn't help but wince at how obviously uncomfortable with it she was. It was a calculated risk sending her into her mind, but whether or not she had wanted her to find out, it hadn't been this way.

"I…don't really know what you mean by find." Akko lied. "There was nothing that surprising in there."

Diana finally looked up at her, tilting her head. "What are you saying?" She asked quietly.

"I'm saying I didn't find anything life changing or whatever." Akko repeated. "And I didn't go looking through all your memories or anything, so it was all no big deal."

Diana's brows furrowed, before a subdued flash of gratitude glinted across her features. "I never truly thought you would, but I'm glad to hear it. I'm…I'm happy to hear you didn't find anything too…distressing."

Akko shrugged, smiling to herself. "I mean…I guess you like swords and that stuff more than I thought."

"What?" Diana blinked. "I…I suppose? There _are_ many decorative suits of armor around my estate, and I've always found them somewhat fascinating. Broadswords, lances, halberds, they are very…classical weapons. I find them neat, in a way."

It was doubtful Diana actually believed her. She was too smart to truly believe they didn't both know about her feelings. But she seemed to realize the gesture Akko was giving her, and eagerly played along with her feigned ignorance. Underachieving truths and whatnot.

She could tell her when she felt more ready. Akko could stand to be more patient with this, especially if it made her happier. Besides that, the supposedly accomplished mind-traveler found questions eating at her once more. That final stretch had been close. Way too close. They were right next to the door right now. She had just barely managed to pull victory out of this, and it added on to her already awkward tension with knowing about Diana's feelings.

Akko ran a hand through her hair. "Hey, so um…can I ask _why_ you trusted me? To go in your head and stuff?"

Diana squinted at her. "What kind of question is that?"

"I'm just…curious, I guess. Did you trust me because you thought I could do it, or just because I was here and I did it before?"

There was a strange sadness in Diana's eyes, but nonetheless, she tapped her chin and collected her thoughts. "…Both, I suppose. I needed this done as quickly as possible, and you were here. But I've always held faith in your tenacity. If anyone could be driven enough to fix this, it's you."

"I _am_ pretty stubborn."

That earned an amused smile. "And besides that, going into someone's mind is a very…personal experience." The smile faded as Diana frowned off into the distance. "I _am_ uncomfortable with someone having access to all my private thoughts and insecurities. I have to be disciplined, because eyes are always upon me, and travelling inside my mind would destroy that illusion. I can only control what I outwardly show. Some people might hold what they find internally against me."

Akko bristled. "What do you mean hold against you? What kinda jerk's gonna get mad about something so ridiculous? That's dumb!" She argued. "I would never do something like that!"

Diana seemed fairly unaffected by her righteous anger. "And do you still wonder why I trust you?"

"…Oh."

Diana reached out, resting a hand on her shoulder. "You're a kind person, Akko." She said, with a gentle smile. "I trust you because I believed you wouldn't think less of me if you saw me when I was more…raw. And I don't believe my faith has been misplaced. You've more than earned it, many times over. If anyone had to see me at my most unguarded, I'm glad it was you."

And Akko was left running a hand through her hair, unable to hide her astonishment. It was hard not to feel touched. "Um. Wow…that…that really means a lot, you know?"

Diana hummed. "You sell yourself too short, sometimes." Her smile turned wry. "Especially for someone who always told me how great of a witch she would become."

Shaking off her bashfulness, Akko playfully elbowed the other girl with a cheery smirk on her face. "Hey, I still will! It's not like I'm giving up on that!"

"I would hope not." Diana arched a brow. "You've certainly made inspiring progress."

…Darn it. Why did she have to say such nice things like that? This was why she could never keep up her confidence around Diana. The smirk had been pretty cleanly wiped off her now warmed face, leaving her with her mouth hanging open and not a single response to make that could nearly repay that kind of genuineness.

"…whelp!" Akko clapped, speaking quickly. "I got a report I should go do, before Sucy yells at me or something. I'll see you later, okay Diana?"

Akko only saw her surprised expression for a second before she spun on her heel and started towards the door, mumbling to herself under her breath. She _really_ needed to get better at dealing with this sort of thing. She hadn't gone far when Diana called out to her.

"Akko, wait." Her face was tense, and her cheeks were turning red. Despite that, there was a clear determination in the blue of her eyes. She took a deep breath to psyche herself up, and brought herself to speak. But the words seemed to fail her. "I…I want to say that…that I…" Her voice was shaking, and she struggled to force herself to speak. "W-well…I…"

Diana sighed, and her face settled to a resigned smile. "I…am sure you'll do wonderful on your report. Feel free to ask me if you need any more help."

Akko was fairly sure that wasn't what she intended to say, but chose not to dwell on it. "Yeah. Yeah! I'll keep that in mind." She smiled back brightly, and began to leave again, until a thought struck her. Against her better judgement, she turned back. "…H-hey, I mean, I could come over this Saturday or something and show you it. I-I mean, if you care."

Diana blinked. "I…with your report? I don't have much problem with it, but…what do you mean by come over?"

Wait, what in the world _did_ she mean? What was she thinking? Hadn't they just decided to quietly sweep this under the rug? Very quickly she added, "I dunno, just get your opinion on how it's going! Just a study… _session_. You know? Just…I mean, if you _want_. Just for…fun, if you do that…sorta thing, I guess."

Diana studied her a moment, before a smile sneaked up her cheeks. "I wouldn't be opposed." She cleared her throat. "…It's nice to just…talk with you sometimes."

"Yeah, you too." Akko scratched the side of her head. "I mean, it'd just be a…whatever kinda thing, you know? The study thing. Just a…you know. You get it."

"Y-yes. I can understand." Diana nodded simply. "You're thinking something very casual."

"That's right. Casual. Something between friends."

"Yes, of course." Diana agreed in a carefully neutral tone. "Between friends."

"No big deal."

"Of course not."

"Just for fun."

"…Saturday you said?"

"Yeah? Yeah."

"Hm."

As their eloquent conversation drew to a close, they exchanged quick and apprehensive smiles. And then they both jumped when silence was broken by the sound of the room's door bursting open.

Professor Anne Finnelan had heard speaking from behind the doors of the Archive, and she was extremely displeased. "There had better not be someone in here! This is a restricted-!" Finnelan's pre-prepared rant was cut short when her eyes narrowed on one of the room's occupants. "… _Kagari_. I shouldn't be surprised anymore. What do you think you're doing?"

Diana stepped forward, not about to let someone be condemned for her own actions. "Professor Finnelan, wait. I can expla-"

But before she had the chance to, Akko roughly brushed past her shoulder, pointing at the professor vindictively. "W-what am I doing? What are _you_ doing?!" She asked in the most accusatory voice she could manage. "Why would you keep a ghost that only possesses girls in an all-girl academy!?

The Professor leaned back at the offending finger in her face. "Kagari, what in the world are you-?"

"I'm talking about how shortsighted you are!" Akko interrupted. "And that's coming from me! Why would you keep something like _that_ here? That's just _asking_ for something to go wrong!"

Finnelan scoffed incredulously. "Someone with _your_ track record has no business talking about bad decision making."

Akko rolled her eyes. "Yeah yeah! I get it! But I'm not the one keeping crazy ghosts just lying around in dumb bottles! Why don't you guys put that somewhere else?!"

"I have no idea what you think you're talking about." Finnelan pinched the bridge of her nose. "But I can tell you right now I have no interest in dealing with your nonsense today."

"Well fine! I'll just leave!" Akko decided. "I have better things to do anyway!"

"That might be the best decision I've _ever_ seen you make, in all your months of schooling!" She shot back.

With an angry growl, Akko stomped past Finnelan and out the Archives. She made her way out towards the dorms with a fuming expression on her face. After a few moments of angry goose-stepping, she glanced over her shoulder, making sure she was well out of view of the Professor.

And then she finally let out a victorious laugh. Things had worked out better than she expected. After all, Finnelan made no secret she didn't like her. Akko felt like she could better figure out how people's heads worked, having spent quite a bit of time inside one. She definitely knew Finnelan was more than willing to get into a shouting match over something petty and inane. That she was willing enough to momentarily forget to give her an actual punishment was something of a lucky guess.

Akko may be stupid, but she was pretty great at getting out of trouble.

She couldn't help but skip back to her room. Saturday couldn't get here fast enough. Granted, it was just a study date. Not even that, a study _session_. And they had both emphasized its casualness. Not to mention, she actually had to _do_ the report now, otherwise it would make it even more awkward.

But still, even if Diana wasn't as excited for it, Akko definitely was. So what if it wasn't a real date? What it _would_ be was more time alone with the girl who stole her believing heart. It would still be fun, and maybe even one day she could work up to a _real_ date, and actually say all that stuff she said before to her in person when she'd actually remember it. Maybe even…kiss her for real one day….

Ah, but she was getting ahead of herself. Casual thing. Right. Probably should actually help Lotte and Sucy get the report ready. And maybe shoot Sucy a quick apology while she's at it. Eat some of those chips she stored in her desk, too. Might as well try to be low-key for the rest of the day, because her heart was still racing. She skipped the rest of the way back to her room, feeling content to worry about the rest of the stuff later.

After all, the truly important thing was, Diana's mind was back in order.

* * *

Diana's mind was in complete disarray.

Punctual Diana couldn't help but grumble under her breath. Her carefully planned schedule was being demolished in front of her eyes. They had many important tasks to take care of, especially since they had spent significantly more time in the Archives than what was originally planned. They still had to finish next week's reading for Advanced Astrology, and their paper for Professor Lukic's class was in need of a third draft.

But instead of doing any of that, they were currently face-down on their desk with their head in their arms. From the feeling the Original was sending out, they were completely mortified, and not without good reason. Upon waking up from their (completely unscheduled!) nap in the Archives, they proceeded to pretend to be delusional in order to spare themselves an embarrassing conversation, then under the influences of several other emotions made a number of rash and ill thought-out decisions until they fainted _again_. Wasting even _more_ valuable time. Was this not the _exact_ reason why Punctual Diana was stationed here? To make sure they always had and took the time to properly consider their choices throughout the day?

But things were just as equally a mess in the real world as they were in the lobby where she diligently worked. Chairs had been tipped over, one of them broken into pieces. Two Officers had been thoroughly defeated, and were crumpled amongst the broken splinters, groaning in pain. The third had begun clawing at her desk, at a desperate bid to push her weakened body upward. And the mental construct with the Rose in her hair was gleefully twirling about the office, completely and utterly overcome with joy.

Punctual Diana looked to the one Officer still moving as she finally managed to push herself upward. "Officer? What in the world happened?"

The Officer coughed and wheezed. "Diana Who is in love with Akko has become too powerful!" She cried. "We…we tried to…bring her back to the Repression wing…but we couldn't make it!"

"I told you!" Rose cheered out to anyone who would listen. "I _told_ you she was so fantastic! She saved our life! And the Original told me she was talking about swords! She…she's like our knight in shining armor! Oh, Akko! Oh, Akko, _yes!_ "

The Officer winced at her singsong voice, desperately turning to Punctual Diana. "We couldn't contain her! She's too…too strong…!" Too weakened to stay upright any longer, the final Officer finally collapsed. With all three of them down, there would be no one to contain the jubilant Rose for quite a while, leaving her free to rave about her boundless love.

But even with the disaster that was her lobby, it was _nothing_ compared to what had happened to her schedule. The itinerary for the upcoming weekend had been more or less planned by the end of the week before. So many carefully managed timetables and agendas, so many tasks placed just so to be finished at the most efficient pace. So much work, and all of it destroyed and pushed aside by a single message from the higher ups at the core, delivered with the highest urgency possible.

" _HIGH PRIORITY. VERY IMPORTANT DATE WITH AKKO ON SATURDAY. MUST IMPRESS."_

An additional suggestion came in from the core, suggesting they should allow some extra time to prepare snacks for the date. The suggestion was immediately retracted before she could think to pencil it in. And then immediately reinstated. And then retracted once more.

Rose picked up one of the Officers from the ground, shaking her excitedly. "Did you know she said she likes our smile? And she said being around us makes her _happy?!_ Did you know that? Did you?" Too ecstatic to keep still, she let go of the Officer, and the body dropped limply to the ground.

"Oh, if only we could've heard more of her voice!" Rose swooned. "What else do you think she said? Do you think she said anything else sweet about us? She's so sweet to us! She's unbelievable!"

With a sigh, and some less than gentle insistence from the higher-ups, Punctual Diana began to cram as many tasks as she could onto Friday and Sunday, to leave the maximum amount of time available for the high-priority event. There wasn't even an exact _time._ It was just placed tentatively somewhere on Saturday. It annoyed her to no end. This…Akko, as it were, was clearly having a negative effect on their productivity.

And if _that_ wasn't enough abuse of her timekeeping abilities, she was interrupted _again_ when Rose climbed on top of her desk to continue her excited babbling. "Do you think we kissed?!" She asked with shining eyes. "I know we kissed right before we fainted, you're welcome for that by the way, but she was holding us when we woke up! Do you think we might've kissed before too? Wouldn't that be so wonderful?"

She rued the day when Rose had been formed. She was much too excitable, and when she got excited it took significant chunks of valuable time to get her back into her room and under control. And between her breaking out so consistently as of late, and the Original having lapses in judgement and _letting_ her leave the Repression Room, the frequency in which Rose was allowed free reign only increased by a distressing amount. And so, Punctual Diana was forced to work while Rose twirled and danced atop her desk. There was little point in asking her to leave. She made it abundantly clear she was not going anywhere any time soon.

This emotion wasn't just a threat to their productivity. She was a threat to their _common sense._

* * *

 _A.N. So the deliriousness was an act. The fainting, however, was not. Half the reason she let herself fall unconscious was because of all that mental trauma she took throughout these chapters. You can guess the other half. The original ending_ did _have her believe she was dreaming, and still kiss Akko, but somehow, the idea of her consciously trying to get out of something embarrassing, and then proceeding to do something even_ worse _was more satisfying._

 _Technically cheated a bit with the last section being from Punctual Diana's POV but still calling the other girl Rose, but the naming convention is a mouthful. But a_ _nyhoo! That's the ending! I wouldn't say I wouldn't change anything, but for the most part, I'm happy with how it turned out. Most fun I've had writing in a while, and this one took me a bit longer just so I could get it the best it could be. Took me an extra half hour to think of a decent chapter title_

 _And don't ask me what the Japanese means, because I can't speak it. Copypaste it into GoogleTranslate or something, I don't know._


	9. BONUS

_A. I got such an insane response to the last chapter, and I was just kinda floored by it! This is sort of my thank you to you guys! The date I know many of you wanted to see!_

 _From reading just the ridiculous amount of comments, I ended up with two major scenarios you guys seemed to want to see, and the date was a close second. I was more planning to just go into some one-shots for a while, but now I actually am thinking about writing a sequel, especially since I want to mess with my pacing a little bit. It would definitely go into what was the biggest request left over by the end about a certain mindscape, but not in the way you might expect. I have an idea, but I can't say when I would start it just because of boring real life reasons._

 _But that aside, here's the last of MindFull for a while! Thanks so much for all the support, encouragement, and critiques!_

* * *

After waiting patiently for a considerable amount of time, Diana couldn't hope to contain her smile as soon as she heard the telltale knocking on her door. She had spent the entire Saturday trying to find random tasks to occupy herself with. _Distract_ herself with, more accurately. But now, finally, the time she had been looking forward to since the afternoon in the Archives several days ago was finally at hand. Her informal 'date' with a certain lovely girl.

Taking the briefest moment to brush any stray hairs from her face, and another to calm any loose nerves, Diana opened the door to find Akko standing there, shifting on her feet. The girl almost dropped the papers in her hand, clamoring to catch them before she looked up with a bright smile.

"Diana! H-hi!" Akko stood up straighter. "So! Um…you…wanna do this study d-…session…thing?"

"Good evening, Akko." She greeted her cordially. "Please, come in. Make yourself comfortable."

The girl nodded simply as she was allowed in. They exchanged a polite, if somewhat awkward inquiry of each other's days (Akko's had been "you know, whatever") and truthfully assured each other they had both been looking forward to this and were happy to see the other there, though neither said it in so many words. Conversation came with a slight tension to it. As a Cavendish, Diana was fairly used to talking to people whilst under pressure, but the current context is not one she typically dealt with. There was a difference between talking to people and connecting to people, after all, and she was more than aware of her shortcomings when it came to more intimate interpersonal relationships. Akko was doing a fairly commendable job of hiding her own anxieties as she took a seat at the coffee table.

Akko's (very lovely) red eyes (but where had that thought come from?) absent-mindedly wandered around her room, in clear search of an ice-breaker. "You know something?" Akko said. "Always kinda forget how big your room is…"

Diana hummed as she sat down next to her. "It will be a bit emptier than usual tonight. Hannah and Barbara left morning to go visit family for the weekend."

There was a hopeful look in Akko's eyes. "So it'll be just us?"

"Yes, I suppose it will be."

Akko stared at her, and the smile grew on her face. It was only when Diana returned the expression with an arched brow did the girl catch herself. She quickly averted her gaze with a light blush and a quieted laugh, and all but jabbed the stack of papers in her direction.

"O-oh, um! Anyway, here's my…paper or whatever. If you wanna look at it."

"I…yes, we should get started." With a gentle sigh, Diana took the girl's report and brought it closer to her eyes to begin reading it over.

* * *

Punctual Diana fiddled with the Eye Projector's remote until the image came in clear on the far wall, an image of the brunette girl sitting at the coffee table, fidgeting in her seat. The mental persona continued to press buttons on the remote, until she was satisfied with the image's clarity, where she then dimmed the room's lights and turned on the Projector's audio.

" _O-oh, um! Anyway, here's my…paper or whatever. If you wanna look at it._ "

The voice of the girl, their date, filled the darkened conference room as Punctual Diana took her seat at the table with the other personas who had gathered to run this event of paramount importance. There were five of them, including herself. The One Who is Knowledgeable, The One Who is Altruistic, The One Who is in Love with Akko, and finally Officer Diana.

"Now, we all know why we're here." Punctual Diana addressed them. "The Original has declared this date, or more formally, this study session, to be of top priority. We need to keep this event progressing in a timely manner."

The Officer crossed her arms in her seat. "We also need to make sure we keep our social standing. The Original wants us on our _best_ behavior for this."

Rose sighed dreamily. "This is so exciting though! Can you all even believe it? After months of waiting, we're finally dating Akko!" She sat up straighter, leveling the rest of the council with a serious look. "We have to make sure she leaves feeling impressed with us!"

Fortunately, the event began with them reading over their date's report for their shared class, giving the personas plenty of time to get situated and prepared for the task at hand. As their body in the real world took the report in her hand, the Eye Projector displayed the image of the sight for the room to eagerly read over.

After taking a moment to read, Altruistic Diana spoke up first. "You know, you can tell her team has improved their academic writing since the last report we've seen." She said appraisingly. "I think it would be fair to give them a compliment for that."

Rose leaned against her elbow with a bright smile. "Isn't it adorable how you can tell which sentences in this she wrote? Just _look_ at that third paragraph. Those are definitely Akko's words."

Knowledgeable Diana's expression darkened as she judged their date's writing. "Hmm…This introduction is terrible. This attention getter needs way more work, the thesis statement is all wrong, and there's barely any transition sentences. Grammatically, it's almost appalling. This attractive girl is clearly not a writer in any sense."

"Now now." Altruistic Diana tutted. "Remember she's our friend and we're here to have a good time."

The Officer nodded in agreement. "Yes, it's very bad etiquette to just insult someone's work. We should be honest, but gentle here. Let's not forget the social context of why this girl is here, after all."

With a curt nod in agreement, Knowledgeable Diana leaned across the table and took the Projector's remote. She pressed the button, sending her words up to the Original, for her to filter and speak out loud.

* * *

"Your introduction could use a little more impact." Diana explained, pointing to various points on the paper. "And these transitions are rather sudden. You could stand to spend a bit more time explaining your argument here. I'm left confused as to what this paragraph means."

"Eh?" Akko tilted her head, utterly lost. "I don't really get it, but…is it really messy then? How bad is it?"

"Don't fret. You've clearly improved considerably. For a first draft, this is more than acceptable. It just needs a little work here and there. I'm sure you can manage that."

After a few minutes of going over specific parts on the paper, Diana couldn't help but smile at the way Akko's face contorted as she concentrated on all the advice she was given. She was drawn into the bewildered, but nonetheless firm, resolve in her red eyes. It always had appealed to her, perhaps even before she had actively realized her feelings.

"I never did thank you properly, did I?" She asked. Akko looked up in confusion.

"For what?"

Diana scoffed incredulously. "For what." She shook her head with a small smile. "For how much you helped me, of course. I may not know much about it, but there is considerable danger involved in this…mind melding business. You put yourself on the line, for my sake, and I want you to know how much it means to me."

"Well, yeah." Akko shrugged. "Of course I'm gonna help you! I don't wanna leave anyone feeling sad, but especially not you!"

The heat rose to her cheeks at Akko's emphasis. "…B-be that as it may, I still cannot overstate my appreciation. For _everything_ you did in there. I know you might be disappointed with how…hesitant I am when it comes to certain subjects, but I-"

Akko just waved her hand. "Ah, but nothing. I'm not disappointed with anything. The Shiny Rod made me learn patience like, a _bunch_ of times. If you don't wanna talk about stuff yet, then we won't! I always told you, you gotta follow your dreams and do what makes you happy!"

It took the typically well-aware Cavendish a moment to register her mouth hanging open. She suppressed a chuckle, simply shaking her head. No matter how hard she tried to plan out her conversations ahead of time, only Akko seem to find so much almost unintentional success in leaving her speechless. "…You truly are too kind to me, Akko."

* * *

"Oh…curses." Punctual Diana groaned. "We spent all that time pre-preparing a response, and now we don't even need it."

"She's just…so _good_!" Rose squealed. "Why are we even talking about this report? We should talk about _her_ instead! Let's tell her she's the most beautiful girl in the world!"

Rose grabbed the remote and sent the suggestion up to the Original. The table's attention snapped to the projection to watch helplessly as they turned back to the brunette girl and complimented her appearance. To their collective horror, they outright told her that she looked nice today.

Their date blinked. " _I look…?_ " She suddenly began to blush red, scratching the side of her head with an embarrassed chuckle. " _O-oh! Wow! T-thanks! You look really nice too. But you always look really nice…b-but I mean-! Y-you know what I mean…_ "

"Give me that!" The Officer said as she snatched the remote back. "Are you _trying_ to make us look foolish right now?"

With the Officer's button press, they quickly shot out an apology for being so forward. She handed control off to Punctual Diana, who then recommended to their date they return to their task and work on their report.

" _Y-yeah. Sure. We should…keep talking about this thing._ " Their date agreed, biting her lip. After a moment, she looked back up. " _A-and for the record I'm not like…weirded out or anything. I thought it was…s-sorta cool, what you said. So thanks._ "

Punctual Diana sat up. "She responded positively?"

The Officer clutched her chest, letting out a sigh of relief. "Thank Goodness. We dodged a bullet. She didn't hate us for flirting with her. We may make it out of this ordeal yet…"

Meanwhile, Knowledgeable Diana tapped her chin, cataloging the new information. "Update to the database on Atsuko 'Akko' Kagari; responded positively to a comment about looking nice, referred to it as 'sorta cool.' Noted." She chuckled to herself. "This is valuable information for future interactions indeed!"

"We should do it again, then!" Rose argued. "Take it up a notch! We should talk about her eyes! I bet she'd love that!"

Altruistic Diana hummed in contemplation. "Well…she _did_ refer to our appraisal as cool, but then, she was also very bashful. We don't wish to make her uncomfortable after all."

"I agree." Punctual Diana said. "We can't be reckless with this…but then…the Original is definitely happy with her reaction. We should continue this conversation, but _gently_. Diana Who is Altruistic, I recommend a more…chaste compliment."

Altruistic Diana took a deep breath and pressed the button on the Projector's remote. A suggestion went up to the Original, and they found themselves complimenting her work ethic and its improvement as of late. Their date, as Knowledgeable Diana dutifully noted she was wont to do, scratched the side of her head.

" _Aw. Heheh. It's not like I'm that good or anything, but thanks. I'm still working on being a great witch and all that. It's tough sometimes, you know?_ "

At the second button press, they then assured their date they thought her bouts of intuitiveness and ingenuity in the face of crisis were impressive.

" _I mean, sure. I do try to fix my messes. But it's not like I'm doing it on my own. I usually have you, or all my friends to help back me up!_ "

They then followed up with a much more personal and honest comment on how inspiring she was as a person, and how admirable they found her.

" _I-inspirational…? I…um, wow. I always wanted to inspire people like Shiny Chariot and stuff, but…wow. Do you really think I've…?_ "

The Officer slapped the remote from Rose's hand. "Would you stop stealing that thing?! You're going to make us say something inane, and then the whole date will be ruined!" With an annoyed grumble, the Officer pressed the button, rephrasing their statement on inspiration on a much more appropriately platonic level. Their date cleared her throat, somewhat abashed.

" _O-oh, yeah. I knew that. Still…do you think when we graduate, I can do magic to help make people happy? I still think that would be amazing, to help bring everyone smiles!"_

They followed with a vague comment about not knowing what the future holds. Altruistic Diana added a comment about believing in her accomplishments so far. Punctual Diana sunk back into her seat. "This is too much." She moaned. "I can't handle all this stress. Dating is a terrible idea."

Knowledgeable Diana wiped the sweat from her brow. "We're definitely learning about her, more than I thought we would. For such a braggart around strangers, her confidence seems to deflate when in more intimate situations. Theoretically, these interactions could signify she is allowing us to see her more vulnerable side, a sign of a close trust."

"But think about how much social standing we're risking with her here!" The Officer said. "If this date takes a negative turn, she might…she might think _less_ of us."

The five of them quietly murmured, trying to suppress their considerable fear. Even the very thoughts sent a flash of panic through the Original, and them by extension. No one could disagree. Atsuko 'Akko' Kagari thinking, God forbid, less of them would be an emotional disaster of unfathomable proportions. Could they truly risk such a scenario? A suggestion cropped up, that perhaps they should lie, say something convincing like they needed to leave and feed their dog or their mother was calling them, in order to save their status and end the date early.

"But she asked _us_ out!" Rose threw up her hands. "We can't lie to her! Besides, how are we supposed to impress Akko and become her girlfriend and potential future fiancé if we call off this date?"

"That _would_ be rude." Altruistic Diana agreed. "She was clearly excited for this study session. She would be disappointed if we just leave like that."

Punctual Diana tapped her pen on her clipboard. "Not to mention, we already invested the past few days convincing our roommates to visit their parents for the weekend. We can't waste that effort."

After another unfortunately short moment of discussion regarding the report, their date had looked back up with a particular glint in her eyes. " _I'm just…you know, I think it's super amazing how much you're always helping me. You're always going out of your way, and I think it's just…nice, you know? I know you're always really busy with stuff and things and whatever, so it really means a lot that you do this stuff._ "

"We should confess!" Rose made a grab for the remote. "She already knows how we feel! Let's make it official! Let's tell her how important she is to us!"

Altruistic Diana shook her head, making her own grab for the remote. "We should return the sentiment instead, tell her we appreciate how much emotional support she provides to us."

* * *

Diana was silent for a moment. "Akko…you've supported me so much over the course of these past few months. I'm not going out of my way at all. I'm merely returning the favor to someone who has become so very important to me."

"H-have I really?"

Diana snorted, looking down at the other girl fondly. "Akko, do I truly need to remind you again you did everything in your power to free my mind only days ago? Or perhaps I should mention the many other times you've encouraged me and even saved my life? You're not _that_ forgetful."

Akko laughed, scratching the side of her head once more. "I mean…still, you helped me a lot too…"

"And as I said, it is something I'm always willing to do. S-so please, just remember that in the future. If I can, I'd like to…" With an almost inaudible sigh, she spoke almost under her breath. "…support you, in any way I can. At any time…f-for anything you need."

Her gaze dropped down to her lap, and the blonde girl blinked in subdued surprise. Neither had noticed until then how Akko's hand had drifted over to hold Diana's own. Akko flushed, and quickly pulled the offending hand back to her side.

"O-oh! Um! S-sorry! Sorry, I didn't even…!"

"…it's fine, Akko. I don't truly mind."

Akko blinked, gaping at the growing redness on her cheeks. "You…don't mind if I…?"

"…If it makes you happy, then by all means." Staring pointedly down at the report on her coffee table, the blonde girl raised her hand in offering. Akko swallowed, turning her gaze to the report as well. But hesitantly, she reached over, quietly giggling to herself.

When she felt Akko's thumb begin to absent-mindedly massage the side of her palm, Diana couldn't help but beam, squeezing her hand in response.

* * *

"AAAAAAAAAAHHH!"

Rose, knocking over her chair as she stood, had begun to scream. Completely overwhelmed with excitement, she grabbed the nearest object and shook it as hard as she could. The nearest object ended up being Altruistic Diana, who didn't even get a chance to cover her ears before the second scream came. "AAAAAAHAHAHAAAAAHHH!"

Rose made a grab for the remote, only for the Officer to snatch it away before she had the chance to influence the Original. The Officer was almost tackled as Rose set her sights on the coveted object.

"We have to kiss her!" Rose said as she tried to wrestle the remote away. "Give me that remote! We _need_ to tell her we love her already and kiss her!"

The Officer looked at her incredulously, holding the device just out of her reach. "We can't just kiss her out of the blue! We were not raised to act like animals!"

"Just _look_ at her!" Rose argued, gesturing towards the projection. "Look how kissable she is! We have to!"

"Society has rules!"

Knowledgeable Diana frantically pointed to the projection. "Look, look! What is she doing? Her shoulder is pressing against us! She's holding our hand _and_ leaning against us!"

Punctual Diana fumbled with her clipboard in a panic. "Wait! This…this is a lot of physical contact. This is going too fast! Officer, what's the protocol for this?"

"Don't ask _me!_ We never went over this in basic braining!"

Altruistic Diana grabbed the remote from her hand. "Alright! Settle down everyone! We'll just…say something simple. There's no need to panic."

With a calm button press, they simply said to their date they were happy she was here. It was benign, polite, and devoid of any overly intimate connotations. The five of them watched with apprehension to how the platitude would be received. Their date let out a light giggle. _"I'm happy you're here too, Diana._ "

A collective sigh of relief filled the conference room, and Altruistic Diana couldn't help but smile smugly. "See? There's no problem. We can handle it jus-"

" _I mean it, too._ " Their date said. _"Not just with this report thing. I…I know I said I didn't find anything in your head, a-and I'm sticking with that, but…I feel like I got to know you even better, and that's…that's kinda exciting you know?_ "

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" Rose screamed again.

"What? I didn't think she'd respond like-!" Altruistic Diana ran a hand through her hair. "How do we interpret this? Is this just a kind sentiment? Is it something more?"

"Stop asking me!" The Officer complained. "I already told you people, I don't _know_ the specific social cues for this dating context!"

"Okay, quiet everyone!" Knowledgeable Diana covered her ears. "I just…I need to add all that to the database. That is a _lot_ of new information to deal with!"

"We just need to stay calm!" Punctual Diana said, trying to convince herself as well. "This psyche has dealt with plenty! We can handle this, right? It's just a girl. It's just a gi-"

" _I know I'm not really making much sense here. But like…I know how you said you trust me to see when you're…unguarded or something, a-and I feel the same way too. I…I'm really happy that we got that close. I just want you to know that._ "

And the statement sent the conference room into complete and utter pandemonium. Chairs clattered to the ground and the table shook as each and every persona stood up in a blind panic, flailing to try to even begin to articulate the proper response.

"Is this a confession?! Does this mean that she loves us too?! Oh no, I'm going to faint!"

"Do we return the sentiment or not? Whose jurisdiction is this? What did she _mean_ by that?!"

"What _is_ this?! This has progressed so far beyond experienced social norms!"

"Stop talking already, stupid attractive girl! This is too much information to process!"

"Just-! Stay calm everyone! We…we can't lose track of time here!"

The room froze at the word. Collectively, they all suddenly were overwhelmed by the same realization. And slowly, they turned to the remote, sitting untouched on the middle of the table. No one had even looked its way this entire time.

"Wait…have…have we responded yet?" The Officer paled. "Wait, how long have we just been just staring at her?!"

"Are you saying we just blanked out?" Rose gasped. "Oh no, that's not good! She's going to think we're weird!"

"No!" The Officer desperately looked for who had the control. "We can't blank out! She's going to think less of us! Quick! Someone grab the remote!"

* * *

"…I…A-Akko, that's…" Diana cleared her throat. "T-thank you. Truly."

* * *

"What was that?!" Punctual Diana sputtered. "That was barely even a sentence!"

The Officer began to fan herself with her hat. "She's going to think we're foolish. We just sabotaged our standing with her. What have we done?"

"I mean…we can fix this right?" Altruistic Diana asked hopefully. "She's our friend, she's forgiving. Maybe if we just apologize…?"

"What if she's not impressed by us?" Rose bit her finger. "How will we _ever_ get to kiss her again if she isn't impressed by us?"

"The Original is going to fire us." Knowledgeable Diana gasped. "We'll all be deemed irrelevant for sure!"

Their panic was interrupted when they heard a light and cheery laugh.

Their attention snapped back to the projection. Their date was smiling brightly, and at them. She didn't say anything, but her expression was fond and happy. Their date…was happy. She had smiled at them. After a moment, the conference room erupted in joyous and relieved cheers.

"She smiled!"

"She didn't hate us!"

"How can Akko _be_ so perfect?"

They all clamored in agreement, and reveled in the relieved feeling the Original sent back to them. Perhaps they had dropped the ball considerably there, but they had gotten very lucky indeed. They had dealt with great emotional hardships thus far, and had somehow come through unscathed. It was hard not to feel proud of themselves for a job well-done, and Knowledgeable Diana took no shame in doing just that.

"You know, my fellow mental constructs?" She said. "I'd say we're doing very well at this dating thing. Diana Who is Punctual, how long has it been? Surely we're nearing the end?"

As the persona checked her watch, the light smile on her face dropped almost instantly. "…It's been about eleven minutes."

The conference room went dead silent. The remote dropped from Altruistic Diana's hand, skidded across the table, and fell to the floor. The Officer swallowed, and began wringing her hat in her hands. "We are going to die."

* * *

After just under three hours, the study session had drawn to a close. Akko had gotten hungry and consequently, they reluctantly decided to call it a night. Diana had merely scribbled her critiques on the paper's margins, figuring Akko wouldn't remember most of them, and that Lotte and Sucy wouldn't appreciate their roommate taking their assignment for three hours and returning empty-handed.

The report, the explicit reason for Akko's visit, had ended up being the least discussed topic. They had talked, and often joked, about the work ethic behind it as opposed to its actual content. Which of course led into a discussion of personalities, a lot of happy reminiscing about shared experiences, and several traitorous and bashful compliments. Akko herself had been surprised when she learned what time it was, remarking that the hours had flown by.

"I'm probably gonna go get dinner with Lotte and Sucy in a little bit." Akko said, looking everywhere but at her face. "Do you…maybe wanna come? You could eat with us, if you want."

Diana nodded. "I think that would be-" She paused, and her smile faded. "…Oh, I'm sorry Akko, but I can't. I have something else I need to take care of tonight."

"Aw, no problem." Akko shrugged. "We can always eat together some other time! Besides, we had fun already, right?"

"Yes, this date of ours was fun. I'm…I'm glad we did it." Diana cleared her throat. "P-perhaps we should do it again, sometime soon."

She marveled at the way Akko flushed. "Y-yeah! J-just, I dunno, let me know whenever you're up for it!"

Akko stood from the table and made her way to the door, and Diana followed close behind to see her off. Despite already thanking her three times, she was still left with a burning desire to show Akko her gratitude for everything that had happened regarding the possession. It was increasingly clear she had very little means of truly communicating the feeling.

Diana stopped her in the doorway, handing her a stack of papers. "Don't forget your report."

"Oh yeah! Sucy would definitely get mad if I forgot this here."

A thought struck her as she watched Akko rather clumsily fumble with her papers, babbling about her roommates. Against her better judgement, Diana took a breath. "…Akko, I'm not sure I can…communicate the full effect quite yet, but there's one more thing I need to give you."

Akko didn't look up, flipping through the pages to make sure she had all of them. "What's that mean?"

Silently, Diana leaned over, placing a soft kiss on the shorter girl's forehead. She could hear the sound of paper crumpling as Akko froze. She leaned back, brushing stray blonde hairs from her face, and she couldn't help the burst of satisfaction at the wide-eyed look on Akko's face.

"D-Diana?" She breathed. "Y-you really just-?"

"Goodnight Akko."

She closed the door before either of them could say another word. From the other side, she silently listened to Akko floundering for a question to ask, tripping over every word coming out of her mouth. She was almost afraid Akko would knock and demand answers, but eventually she sighed, murmuring rather excitedly to herself under her breath as she walked back to her room.

* * *

And Rose's head thumped down on the table as she fainted. She was completely burned out.

The Officer breathed heavier and heavier, leaning her head against her elbow. "That was _way_ too risky. I can't believe we did that. Thank goodness we closed the door in time. She might've said something…"

"Ah, but do you feel that?" Knowledgeable Diana gestured upwards. "The emotion the Original is sending out? That risk paid off. We're in the clear."

Punctual Diana, with a long sigh of relief, began to adjust the day's schedule once more. "Excellent job, Dianas." She said to the table. "We completed this task with minimal incident."

And the council all sent out congratulations to each other. It was hard not to feel accomplished. After a long and stress-inducing time, they had completed the high priority event. The study session, their informal date, was finally over. They could relax for a while. Or at least, that had been the plan, before a realization struck.

"Wait a minute." The Officer stiffened. "At the end. We…we called it a _date_."

The conference room froze and turned to stare. It took them a moment to truly register the significance of what she was talking about. And then when they realized the full extent, they erupted into a panic.

"We did _what?!_ " Altruistic Diana paled. "Oh no. Oh this is not good. It was a study session this whole time. We can't just switch to _date._ "

Knowledgeable Diana clasped her hands in front of her face. "Just…we should stay calm. There is a chance that she didn't notice our faux pas. We just have to hope. Maybe she missed it."

"But…!" Punctual Diana rapidly flipped through the papers on her clipboard. "The schedule called it a date!"

The Officer grabbed her the shoulders. "But they referred to it as a study _session_ in the real world! That was the official term!"

Altruistic Diana bit her knuckle. "Maybe…maybe this isn't so bad, right? I mean, she already knows about our feelings for her. She made a really mature decision when she saved us in the Archives, almost uncharacteristically empathetic. So perhaps it's fine if she heard us, right? Right?"

"Not right!" The Officer argued. "Not right at all! We are _not_ ready to talk about this subject yet! It's too soon!"

Punctual Diana pulled her hair out of its bun in her stress. "Okay, stay calm everyone! We don't have a class with her until Monday at 11:00! If we can just…avoid her tomorrow and up until then, we'll have plenty of time to think of something!"

Knowledgeable Diana began hyperventilating. "But what explanation can we give?! Especially since we kissed her! We'd have to talk about _that_ too!"

"Oh no, you're right! We _did_ do that! What do we do now? What can we even do?"

"Can we still talk to her again? She'll definitely think differently of us!"

"This is bad! This is an awful turn of events! Oh, what have we done?!"

"What's _wrong_ with us?! What were we thinking?!"

* * *

Diana leaned her back against the door, with a tired and embarrassed groan. "Oh god…what was I thinking?"


End file.
